Guerrilla Snorefare

Talks about talks about the possibility of talks

2008-10-26T05:59:00.000-07:00

It appears the Dalai Lama's envoys have just realised something approachin' the bleedin' obvious when the twenty millionth round of talks about talks about meeting for talks between the Dalai Lama's envoys and the CCP looked like they were about to possibly arrange a meeting between the Prez and the Mr Gyatso.

ONE of the Dalai Lama's top envoys says Tibetan negotiators will present Chinese negotiators with a detailed autonomy plan at their next meeting in October. "During the eighth round (of negotiations held since 2002), it is almost about all or nothing,'' Kelsang Gyaltsen told German news magazine Der Spiegel today.
"We will present a detailed plan of how we foresee autonomy in Tibet. If the Chinese side reacts positively, one could propose specific preliminary steps, for example a pilgrimage of the Dalai Lama to China.
"Such a development could lead to a meeting between His Holiness and the Chinese
president and provide decisive momentum.'' Mr Gyaltsen said he had reason to believe Beijing was ready to resolve the dispute over Tibet in negotiations.

But just a couple of days ago:

DHARAMSHALA, India (AFP) — The Dalai Lama is considering a major policy shift towards China following a complete lack of progress in talks on Tibetan autonomy with Beijing, a senior aide said Monday. The Tibetan leader's spokesman Tenzin Taklha said all options would be on the table at a meeting scheduled next month of exiled Tibetan leaders involved in the campaign for greater autonomy for their Himalayan homeland."The only non-negotiable aspect is that the movement will still be non-violent. Everyone is agreed on that," Taklha said.

As I noted several months ago:

Now, I don’t want to sound cynical or nuffin’, but how on God’s green earth is
the CCP going to get away with making a pact with the man they have portrayed as
the devil’s spawn for almost six decades? The hate for the Dalai Lama held by
vast sections of Han Chinese is so palpable you can almost smell it. After
spending decades of whipping up a cult of Lama loathing among their citizens, an
agreement which sees the CCP invite the malodorous monk to the motherland is
going to be a miracle on a par with the second coming.I wish the DL's envoys the
best of luck. But I think the CCP have invested too much effort in creating an
imagined enemy in the form of exiled Tibetans to allow them the space to do a
U-turn now. And even if in some divine act they can come to an accommodation,
how are the fen qing (nationalist youth) and other Han Chinese going to take it?
It might just start a revolution....

But wait! Just when such definitive statements are made, according to the latest info from the ever reliable oracle of Chinese officialdom that is Xinhua, (via the BBC) comes this:

Chinese authorities are to arrange fresh talks with envoys of the Dalai Lama "in
the near future", the Chinese state news agency Xinhua has said.
The agency quoted an unnamed government official as saying the exiled spiritual leader of Tibet should "treasure this opportunity" and respond positively.

So I will leave the reader, all both of them, with this philosophical question. Is this a political saga, or Days of Our Lives?

The big chill

2008-10-26T05:38:00.000-07:00

Winter is coming my friends. The chill air is undulating over the Mongolian steppe and wrapping its frosty serpentine scales over the northern capital. The time for God's Monkeys to head indoors is nigh. Sake season is upon us. Static and stale cigarette smoke will be our constant companions for the next three months. The urban desert of a Beijing winter is about to intrude itself on our existence. SIGH.

I hate being cold.

Spin, intrigue, openness and a (lack of) protests

2008-10-20T03:45:00.000-07:00

Just when we thought that the right to protest, a flickering flame tenuously linked to the hope of the Olympic dream and the dodgy old deal-making bastards at the IOC was over, a new wave of hope has poured petrol on the flame of Freedom Of Speech.

SANUR - The Chinese organizers of the 2010 Asian Games in Guangzhou said Monday protests would be allowed "in certain areas" during the event, but were
reluctant to provide details. They also indicated they would follow the policy China adopted for the Beijing Olympics in allowing foreign reporters greater freedoms to do their jobs, although the same rights do not extend to domestic journalists. "Yes, we will allow protests to take place in certain areas. We have planned for this," said Guangzhou government vice-secretary general Gu Shiyang. But Gu, speaking on behalf of the city's vice mayor Xu Ruisheng who had poor English, refused to elaborate when pressed by AFP, becoming increasingly irritated. "We are not so interested in this question, we are very busy with organizing the Games, not about protests," he said on the sidelines of the inaugural Asian Beach Games in Bali. "We are interested in hosting one of the best Games ever. We are not holding the Games for protesters, we are holding the Games for Asia."

And after the raging success of the Olympic protest model, in which the Chinese people displayed their incredibly rabid thirst for harmony by not staging a single protest, what better way for China to again prove to their ever decreasing band of doubters that China is a tolerant, peaceful nation, where peaceful protests are tolerated if they do not exist?

In a curious Orwellian twist, when I googled "China" news just before writing this post, the next entry that came up was:

China extends Olympic freedoms for foreign reporters
CHINA HAS extended rules introduced for the Olympic Games allowing foreign reporters to move and interview people freely throughout the country. The move, which came at the 11th hour, means that foreign journalists will still be able to interview people without seeking official permission and will be permitted to travel in areas outside of the cities in which they are accredited.

However, there are two important caveats:

1) The decision to extend the freedoms for foreign journalists is a sign of growing openness in China, but there were no breakthroughs on freedoms for domestic media.
2) Reporters will still have to get permission from local authorities to gain access to the sensitive Himalayan region of Tibet.

And possibly even more fascinating was this article, discussing the possible imminent political demise of Wen Jiabao:

CHINA'S most popular politician, Prime Minister Wen Jiabao, has become a target for Communist Party hardliners and could be forced from office, according to an
influential magazine in Hong Kong.
Its report is a rare insight into the struggle over the future of China between political reformers and guardians of the police state. The Prime Minister's popularity rose this year as he comforted the victims of the earthquake in Sichuan province, visited people caught up in disastrous snowstorms and defended China's unyielding policy on Tibet. A 66-year-old known as "Grandpa", he has his own page on Facebook, the social networking website seen by millions. Rivalries inside the party have broken out behind the facade of unity erected for the Olympic Games, said Kaifang (Open), the monthly magazine known for its political sources inside China and its publication of information banned in the media.
It said hardliners in the party's propaganda department and at the People's Daily
newspaper had orchestrated a campaign of abuse directed at Mr Wen's supposed
support for universal values such as democracy and human rights. "China's ship of reform is on the rocks and risks sinking," Kaifang said in its analysis. "The party needs to find a scapegoat."
Last week, important land reforms were put on hold. Mr Wen had also been passed over for the job of heading a prestigious committee, the magazine said. It listed several press attacks, which, as is often the case in Chinese politics, did not identify their victim but left no doubt among those in the know as to who it was.
The most prominent critic was Chen Kuiyuan, vice-chairman of the Chinese People's
Political Consultative Conference, a rubber-stamp body whose title sums up everything it is not. "Some in China want to dance to the West's tune," Mr Chen wrote. The People's Daily of September 10 printed a column headlined "How to see through the theory of so-called universal values".
Today, the Prime Minister is seen by many ordinary Chinese as a friendly face at the apex of power. He has been compared to the veteran revolutionary Zhou Enlai, who is claimed to have moderated the worst crimes of Maoism.

I am quite interested to see the reaction from the people if he steps down, though I guess it will be accepted with little complaint.

Chinese Democracy

2008-10-13T04:44:00.000-07:00

No, this is not about politics. Fools.

My first Guns 'n' Roses album was Appetite For Destruction. I didn't buy it - I swapped it for Michael Jackson's Thriller. It must have been sometime in the early nineties. Nevermind was all the rage, Kurt Cobain was still alive, and I was just becoming musically aware. Nirvana was the background music of my early teenage years, but GNR was souffle to my ears.

The deep affection I felt for this band hasn't waned over time, but it has morphed. When I was not yet a teenager I found the unbridled energy of the driving guitar solos thrilling. Each song was a wild ride of testosterone-fuelled excess. As my musical tastes developed, I began to notice the almost comically ridiculous nature of the band's antics. And lyrics. And hair. And everything else about them. But the shine has never worn off.

In 2007, I had the good fortune to go and see the band live in my hometown of Perth, Western Australia. Actually, it was not GNR, but Axl Rose was the swaggering frontman, and all the classics were played. Middle-aged, carrying a few extra kilos and some ridiculously plaited long dyed blonde hair, he wouldn't be out of place in certain seedy areas of Bangkok. But he belted out the music with the force of a sonic tsunami - even if he did pant a bit in between songs. Jumping and swaying in between bearded bogans* - and their equally bearded bogan mothers, I fell in love with Gunners all over again. This time as something that was almost as a parody of itself. Music, and an image that is sublime in its ridiculousness, and proud of it.

And so it is with considerable bogan relish I would like to announce that the final musical fruit of the band is about to be released to a record store near you.

Unless you are in China. I just can't see the album name getting past the censors.

Guns N' Roses' long-awaited, endlessly delayed new album, Chinese Democracy, finally has a release date. According to the music industry site Hits Daily, the CD will drop at all Best Buy stores, where it is an exclusive, on the Sunday prior to Thanksgiving, November 23. This will give the album a full seven days on sale before entering the chart on December 2. Best Buy's sales week runs from Sunday through Saturday night.

What were they thinking when they came up with this album name 12 years ago??

*A bogan is southern Australian slang for white trash. More or less.

AXL: On a crusade for democracy.

The October blues

2008-10-12T02:37:00.000-07:00

As the days get shorter and a chill wind seeps in over the Mongolian steppe, the leaves turn a fiery amber of warning - a warning to the good citizens of Beijing that they better get some winter clothes quick smart before they freeze their royal Rastafarian nay-nays off. And so it was with a heavy heart and a wallet full of plastic I trudged yesterday to Xidan, in order to subject myself to the doof-doof music and blinding lights of Beijing department stores.

For me, shopping is an unreasonably stressful experience. The indecision, the resentment that I have to part with hard-earned cash, the complete lack of an ability to discern the quality and style of an item of clothing, and the pesky sales people, all conspire to make the experience something to dread.

In addition, I have an intense dislike of bargaining. I would often prefer to pay double the price for something if I don't have to listen to a Silk Street shop assistant shrilly claiming the quality of a pair of trousers is the same as the big name brand it purports to be. As a result I generally end up spending far more money than I have to just to escape the pain of tao jia huan jia.

Six hours later, I had been from Xidan, to Yashow, to the Village in Sanlitun. I had searched, haggled, calculated, rejected, and walked away in digust.

And for all my blood, sweat and tears, I had a pair shoes and a pair of trousers. Lest I want to freeze this winter, the pain of shopping is not yet over! Sigh...

Sino-US triangulation

2008-10-10T03:53:00.000-07:00

Even in theses strange days, it is a strange situation indeed when the sale of $6.5 billion of arms is seen as a welcoming sign of return to balance. But this is the crux of the argument in this article from the Associated Press:

TAIPEI, Taiwan (AP) — Taiwan's once-strained relations with the United States are back on track after the Bush administration approved a long-delayed $6.5 billion package of weapons to help the island defend itself against China.
Though China reacted angrily, the deal is also a sign that the sometimes shaky three way relationship between China, Taiwan and the U.S. is moving back into balance.

So we are back to normal. Taiwan is a province with its own government, foreign relations, armed forces, diplomatic service, currency, Olympic team, and flag. The US adheres strictly to the policy of One China, and makes millions off selling weapons to one of its provinces. China continues to refer to Taiwan as an inalienable part of its teritory, and in the same breath talks about improving cross-straits relations and point up to a thousand missiles at its own supposedly inalienable citizens. And all the recent promise of Sino-US defence ties have gone up in smoke.

Beijing has told the Pentagon and the US Defence department that it will not allow a series of senior military visits to go ahead. The trips included one visit to the US by a senior Chinese general.
US naval ships will also be banned from docking in Chinese ports and meetings to stop the spread of weapons of mass destruction will be postponed "indefinitely".

At the end of the day, although Ma is supposedly more of a realist and than the Chen Shui Bian, I can't see any improvement or way forward in the relationship. On the one hand, you have direct flights between the two places. On the other hand, there are bigger and better weapons pointed at each other. Sum total of improvements in relations since Ma became pres? None.

What a dishearteningly predictable world it is.

Capitalism takes a backward step

2008-10-02T22:14:00.000-07:00

An interesting article in the Economist talks a man who claims that China is becoming less capitalistic:

But what about the growing cohort of Chinese companies starting to strut the world stage? Surely that is evidence of a healthy and expanding private economy. Mr Huang’s evidence shows that, on closer inspection, these firms are either not really Chinese or not really private. Lenovo, a computer group, has succeeded because it was controlled, financed and run not from mainland China but from Hong Kong (a happy legacy of the founder’s family connections there—not
something enjoyed by most Chinese businessmen). The subsidiaries of Haier, a white-goods maker, were also put out of reach of mainland bureaucrats early on. Wahaha, a food producer, Galanz, a maker of microwave ovens, and many others all depended on foreign protection and capital to grow and escape state strictures. Indeed one of the main, and underappreciated, functions of foreign investment in China has been to play venture capitalist to domestic entrepreneurs. As for Huawei, a telecoms group and one of China’s much vaunted“global” companies, its structure and links to the state are so convoluted that
the most diligent China-watchers have little idea if it is a private or state firm. They do, however, agree that Huawei’s opacity is a microcosm of China’s distorted economy.

Skype censorship

2008-10-02T21:56:00.000-07:00

According to this article:

China is monitoring the chat messages of Skype users and censoring them if they contain sensitive keywords such as Tibet or Communist
Party, according to a group of Canadian researchers.The massive surveillance operation of TOM-Skype, a joint venture between Chinese mobile firm TOM Online and Skype, owned by US online auction house eBay, was alleged by Citizen Lab, a University of Toronto research group.

This may or may not be true. I use Skype quite a bit though, and I can't say I have ever noticed interference (supposedly words like Tibet attract attention). Then again, I don't chat in Chinese all that much, so possibly it is only the Chinese that is being monitored.

It also sounds like a hell of a lot of effort to go to to stop a few conversations. I'm not calling bullshit yet, but I would like to know more.

A scary future

2008-10-02T03:33:00.000-07:00

It's October 2009........

President McCain has been dead for two months. President Palin has declared war on Russia. And abortion. And moose. And green activists.

She has personally said she wants to "kill herself some non-believers." Under the umbrella of job creation and healthcare, that is.

Oil is at $300 a barrel. Although they can't afford to fly, Americans are leaving en masse. The Canadian army (ha) is desperately trying to stem the flow of refugees across the border. Boatloads of Americans are attempting to cross the Atlantic in huddled masses, desperate for a new life in the New World of the European Union. Others are turning up in Vietnam, China and Australia (where they are sent to prison camps in the desert.)

Thankfully it looks less and less like this is actually going to happen. According to this article:

A GROWING proportion of US voters question Republican vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin's readiness for the job, according to a national opinion poll reported by The Washington Post.The poll results came as the Alaska governor prepared to face Democrat Joe Biden in the only vice presidential debate before the November 4 election.
About half of all voters surveyed said they were uncomfortable with the idea of Republican presidential nominee John McCain taking office at age 72, and 85 per cent of those voters said Governor Palin does not have the experience needed to be president, according to The Washington Post/ABC News poll.

Praise the lord!

Gymnasts not underage after all?

2008-10-01T21:21:00.000-07:00

One of the bigger controversies of the Beijing Olympics concerned the question of whether some or all of the Chinese women's team were underage due to their tiny frames and incriminating information appearing on the internet. This questioning provoked an extremely defensive response by the Chinese side, including the old chestnut of "hurting the feelings" of the gymnasts' families. However, according to an investigation, this year's team is in the clear, but China's bronze-medal winning team in Sydney is still under suspicion.

China's gold medal gymnasts are in the clear. Its team that won the bronze medal eight years ago, however, still faces questions. International gymnastics officials on Wednesday closed their 5
1/2-week investigation into the ages of the Chinese gymnasts at the Beijing Olympics, saying the documentation provided confirms they were old enough to compete. But two members of the 2000 squad — Dong Fangxiao and Yang Yun — remain under scrutiny.

This is despite an American computer expert finding documents that he claimed prove that she was in fact only 14 at the time of the competition. From The Times:

Mike Walker, a computer security expert, told The Times how he tracked down two documents that he says had been removed from a Chinese
government website. The documents, he said, stated that He’s birth date was January 1 1994 - making her 14 - and not January 1 1992, which is printed in her passport.

He turned to a Chinese search engine, Baidu. In its cache he found both documents. "The listing in there, quite clearly, is He Kexin’s birth date, January 1, 1994," Mr Walker said. That makes her 14 years and 220 days old and too young to compete. The lists were compiled by the
General Administration of Sport of China. How aggressive and sustained the IOC-ordered investigation will be remains to be seen. If it did ultimately result in the stripping of gold medals from one of China’s favourite athletes, it would be an Olympic scandal with reverberations far beyond the sport itself. In July the New York Times published references to articles in the Beijing press in which He was referred to as only 14 years old.

Presumably, He Kexin and her teammates had competed at international level before the Olympics. I wonder if there were many questions about her age then. And if there were, were requests made for corroborating proof?

He Kexin: 16 years old, fake ID

Censorship

2008-09-27T06:06:00.000-07:00

The following article was written by a chief executive in a Chinese publishing company and published in the New York Times:

I always used to hate it when foreigners focused on censorship of the media in China. I think foreigners have this image of a Fu Manchu-like Chinaman, sitting in a dark corner trying to censor everything. I often wanted to say: “It is not like that. We don’t really feel that much censorship.”

Take my job as a lifestyle magazine editor and publisher. We have not been censored for the last four years, and we have had pretty aggressive (i.e., very sexy) fashion shoots, etc. I mean, FHM is the
most popular men’s magazine here.

Clearly we have liberalized.

However, during the current milk powder crisis, I realized censorship is actually pretty strong. Yes, Fu Manchu as Big Brother is among us. There is a lot of open debate about the milk powder crisis on the Internet. People are questioning the news, and everyone suspects a massive government cover-up job. However, all this debate is banned on state-owned media, particularly television.
Another prime example of censorship during the Olympics happened when the Chinese hurdler Liu Xiang dropped out of the race. There was a lot of speculation as to how long his coach, the government, his sponsors and even Liu himself had known that he could not compete. The public felt that they were given a song and dance at the last minute. Again, state-owned traditional media were not allowed to talk about it.

I must say I find it very difficult in some ways to understand the comment “It is not like that. We don't really feel that much censorship.” Really? Is that a willfull myopia?

As part of my general reading after this article, I googled "China press freedom." To get to the first few documents listed I had to use a proxy server. (Incidentally, according to Freedom House in 2008 China ranks equal 181st out of 195 countries in terms of freedom of the press - North Korea is last.)

However, although it is easy to be sarcastic about and critical of comments like the ones made in the article above, it is neither constructive nor useful. The fact is, many Chinese people (though by no means all) feel the same way. It could be argued, for example, that this is a cultural difference, and how Chinese respect for authority and supposedly raging hunger for harmony are simply at odds with western liberal ideas of freedom of speech.

But there is another take on this article. The writer is a chief executive at a Chinese publishing company. She KNOWS how much censorship affects what can be published, and she KNOWS that is she is too harsh in her comments written in a neo-imperialistic capitalist mouthpiece like the New York Times it is going to seriously disrupt her guanxi with the powers that be. That's why, of all the corrupt and non-harmonious events that happen in China on a daily basis, she chooses Liu Xiang's freakin' achilles heel (gossip, not harmful) the melamine scandal (already out of the bag) and nudity and sex (as if any China watcher really considers that as important) as examples of censorship. One comment on the original article calls this "complicit ignorance" and I have to say I agree.

The funniest news this week

2008-09-26T02:52:00.000-07:00

China posts fake rocket launch story

CHINA'S leading Xinhua news agency reported the successful flight of the Shenzhou VII - complete with detailed dialogue between the
astronauts - hours before the nation's third-ever manned space mission had even lifted off. On Thursday morning, Xinhua posted a story on its website saying the Shenzhou capsule had been successfully tracked flying over the Pacific Ocean even though the rocket and its three astronauts had not yet been launched. The article, dated September 27, described the rocket in flight, complete with a sharply detailed dialogue between the three astronauts. Excerpts are below: "After this order, signal lights all were switched on, various data show up on rows of screens, hundreds of technicians staring at the screens, without
missing any slightest changes ... "One minute to go!' 'Changjiang No.1 found the target! ... "The firm voice of the controller broke the silence of the whole ship. Now, the target is captured 12 seconds ahead of the predicted time ... "The air pressure in the cabin is normal!"Ten minutes later, the ship disappears below the horizon. Warm clapping and excited cheering breaks the night sky, echoing across the silent Pacific Ocean." An editor at Xinhau told AFP that the story had been posted due to a technical problem. "We dealt with it after we had found it," the editor said.

I love those last two lines. No explanations as to why they were writing stories in advance of them happening, but an assurance that it was dealt with, whatever that means. In other news, Shenzhou did succesfully take off. However whether the mission will be succesful is another question. This from the Guardian:

The state media said investigations showed that most of those taken ill had consumed milk labelled with the Sanlu brand. The company is China's biggest milk powder producer, with almost a fifth of the market, and is the dairy supplier to the country's space programme.

Will this mission end in melamine-inspired failure? Only time will tell. Stay tuned, my fellow taikonauts.

One reason why Kevin Rudd is a better PM than John Howard

2008-09-20T01:37:00.000-07:00

In his eleven years of being Australian prime minister, I don't think I once heard John Howard articulate any vision of how he wanted to make Australia a better place. As a prime minister, the man was a manager rather than a leader. A product of the World War II generation, it seemed he was unable to move on from the post-war view that because America joined the war just before Australia was invaded, Australia holds an eternal and unquestioning allegiance to support the US in any and all conflicts it places itself in. (Previous to that war many Australians felt that way about Britain.) As such, his attitude to the rest of the world lacked nuance, substance and vision. Rudd, on the other hand, is a product of the diplomatic service, speaks a good standard of Chinese, and has a clearly articulated, if highly ambitious, vision for Australia and Asia in the coming century. This is what he said at today's OzAsia symposium, according to WA Today:

"Our challenge in the future is not to retreat to any view of Australia which is a small Australia, but instead to ensure a vision for Australia which is wide and open to the world and region," he told an OzAsia symposium in Adelaide today.

Mr Rudd said his government's mission was "for Australia to be the most Asian literate nation in the western world".

He said the future of Australia was "tied to the most dynamic region in the world".

"The 21st century will be the Asia Pacific century ... so we need to make sure that in decades ahead we are fully engaged with the region," he said.

After more than a decade of dreary conservative attitudes to Australia's place in the world, this is like watching an episode of South Park after 10 episodes of the Brady Bunch. It's like listening to the party mix after 10 hours of country music. It's like drinking a mocha double frappuchino whip with a shot of vodka after 10 soy lattes. Next stop.... an Australian republic.

The whacko from Wasilla

2008-09-17T19:57:00.000-07:00

With the gathering storm clouds portending a giant shit-storm of fiscal misfortune the world over, I am now cautiously predicting an Obama win in the US election. Of the two candidates, I think he is better positioned to claim authentically strong financial credentials. However, the sick and twisted voyeur in me is still somewhat curious to see what a McCain, and potentially Palin, presidency would bring, particularly in light of this story from the Alaska Daily News:

In June, long before she was selected as the Republican nominee for vice president, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin attended a religious gathering at the Wasilla Assembly of God, her former church.

Standing there on stage and speaking to the college-aged graduates of the church's Master's Commission ministry, the governor reminisced about growing up in the fellowship -- "getting saved here, getting baptized by Pastor Riley in Little Beaver Lake Camp" -- while urging the new disciples to help fulfill the church's mission, as well as certain destinies for America and Alaska.

Pray for the construction of the $30 billion natural gas pipeline, Palin told them. Pray for the military men and women overseas, "that our leaders, our national leaders, are sending (U.S. soldiers) out on a task that is from God. That's what we have to make sure that we're praying for -- that there is a plan and it's God's plan." Later, senior pastor Ed Kalnins -- with Palin standing at his side -- spoke about tapping into Alaska's natural resource wealth in order to fulfill the state's destiny of serving as a shelter for Christians at the end of the world.

"I believe that Alaska is one of the 'refuge states' -- come on you guys -- in the Last Days," Kalnins said, raising his arm to underscore his point. "And hundreds of thousands of people are going to come to this state to seek refuge. And the church has to be ready to minister to them."

Now that she's been selected as Republican presidential candidate John McCain's running mate, such comments raise questions: What are Sarah Palin's religious beliefs? What churches does she attend and who are her pastors? How have her beliefs played out in her public life in Alaska? What do they portend for a possible vice president?

This is the million dollar question: What does this portend for a possible vice-president? Hopefully, not a lot.

But for a President, which is definitely on the cards if McCain doesn't make it through the next four years, I think we know. A gun totin', god fearin', bible thumpin', abortion hatin', abstinence teachin', military promotin', oil guzzlin', environment trashin' George Bush Jr II, except with big hair and from Alaska. YEEEHAAW, let's go shoot ourselves some non-believers!

Green China

2008-09-16T06:17:00.000-07:00

Ask any expat or traveller to this country about what they first notice when they arrive, and if it's a major city, they will most likely answer pollution. As far as I'm concerned, pollution may be what ultimately drives me home to the fresh clean air in southwest Aus. The pollution in Chinese cities regularly gets discussed in overseas press, but less often does the investment in green technology. This is from the Telegraph.

China is on the verge of becoming the world's largest investor in green energy as it struggles to reverse the catastrophic effect its industry has wreaked on the environment. Last year, China spent £6 billion on renewable energy projects, just slightly short of Germany, the world leader. This year, the Communist Party has vowed to redouble its efforts.Li Junfeng, an energy expert at the National Development and Reform Commission (NDRC), said that in terms of the "overall scale of renewable energy development", China already leads the way.

Greenpeace believes China can shortly produce half of its energy from renewable sources.

That last sentence is particularly startling. Greenpeace is not the kind of organisation to overstate how well nations do in taking care of their environments.

Tens of thousands of pollution-inspired riots every year have helped drill home the message. The Ministry of Public Security has listed pollution among the top five threats to China's peace and stability. Two years ago, the government publicly admitted that the Chinese landscape was "chu mu jing xin" or "whatever meets the eye is shocking".

When you also factor in the one-child policy, which had already resulted in hundreds of millions less consumers being born, one would suggest that China does in fact punch above its weight in terms of developing long-term sustainable energy consumption practices. That's not to say it's above robust criticism at times, but it's definitely a poignant implied critique of developed democratic energy hogs like the good ole US of A.

Taikonauts about to taik off

2008-09-16T02:35:00.000-07:00

This from the AFP:

BEIJING (AFP) — A 42-year-old fighter pilot has been chosen to become the first Chinese person to walk in space, with the historic mission set for September 25, the government said Tuesday.

The blast-off will occur after the staging of a successful Olympics and Paralympics -- events that helped boost national pride and thus the popularity of the leadership -- and ahead of China's National Day on October 1. China has even greater space ambitions, with an eventual plan to put a man on the moon by about 2020, according to some sections of China's state-run press.

This reminds me of a curious incident that happened several years ago when I was discussing travel plans with an Australian and a Chinese friend in Sichuan. The Chinese girl was heading north into Xinjiang (or maybe Gansu), where we had just come from, so we were giving her tips on what we thought were the best places to visit. However there was one town she mentioned wanting to go to that we had never heard of, so I got out the good ole' Lonely Planet and tried to find it. It was nowhere to be seen. After I showed her the empty space, she realised why it had not appeared. It was because it was a centre for China's space program and foreigners were not permitted into the area. I can't remember what is was called. However this flight is being launched from Jiuquan in Gansu, so I presume it's the same place.

Doubt there will be many foreign tourists there to gawp at the event, though.

Is the end of anonymous internet nigh?

2008-09-15T04:38:00.000-07:00

This article from Cnet:

A United Nations agency is quietly drafting technical standards, proposed by the Chinese government, to define methods of tracing the original source of Internet communications and potentially curbing the ability of users to remain anonymous.
The U.S. National Security Agency is also participating in the "IP Traceback" drafting group, named Q6/17, which is meeting next week in Geneva to work on the traceback proposal. Members of Q6/17 have declined to release key documents, and meetings are closed to the public.
The potential for eroding Internet users' right to remain anonymous, which is protected by law in the United States and recognized in international law by groups such as the Council of Europe, has alarmed some technologists and privacy advocates. Also affected may be services such as the Tor anonymizing network.

At Slashdot, where I first found the link to this story, there was also this insightful comment from a poster:

"When anonymous internet is a crime, only criminals will have anonymous internet. As usual, this would be a law that will almost exclusively affect the law abiding."

Although I am no tech whiz (just look at the layout of my blog) or activist, my initial impression of this kind of thing is that it will end up something like the war on drugs - costly, time-consuming, and ultimately unwinnable. At this point I could go on a rant about the meddling Chinese government, the hypocrisy of the American government,or general outrage against the powers that be, but I also think this kind of plan may have some positives. After all, the internet offers an effective medium through which criminals can interact with one another. I'm sure the best of these will be able to continue to do so no matter what, but this may help in cutting out the less sophisticated stuff.

Is this the end for Kim Jong-Il?

2008-09-09T23:25:00.000-07:00

In the marvellous documentary "Team America," investigative journalists Matt Stone and Trey Parker go undercover into North Korea and gain unprecedented access to one of the most fascinating political figures of our time. Long derided in the biased western media as a "despot" "tyrant" and "jackass," the real Kim Jong-Il reveals himself as a deeply complex, and touchingly flawed figure. In one scene, he sings revealingly to the camera of the tortured poignance of his existence. Here's a flashback:

I'm so Ronery / So ronery / So ronery and sadry arone / There's no one / Just me onry / Sitting on my rittle throne / I work very hard to be number one guy / but, stiwr there's no one to right up my rife / Seems rike no one takes me serirousry / And so, I'm ronery / A rittle ronery / Poor rittle me / There's no one I can rerate to / Feewr rike a biwd in a cage / It's kinda siwry / but, not reawry / because, it's fiwring my body with rage / I'm the smartest, most crever, most physicawry fit / but, none of the women seem to give a shit / Maybe someday, they'wr awr notice me / And untiwr then, I'wr be ronery / Yeah, a rittle ronery / Poor rittle me...

I think we'll all agree this kind of stuff can really tug at the heart strings. But rather than eliciting sympathy from the axis of countries bent on the destruction of North Korea, the western press continues to spread falsehoods and falsity about the dear leader, using such awful puns as "Is Kim Jong Ill?" This from the Australian newspaper The Australian (newspaper).

NORTH Korea's No.2 has denied reports that leader Kim Jong-il is ill, which a Pyongyang diplomat called a Western "conspiracy"."There are no problems," Kim yong-Nam, the regime's de facto head of state, told Kyodo news agency in Pyongyang. He confirmed that Kim Jong-il, 66, did not show up at a major parade yesterday marking North Korea's 60th anniversary. "While we wanted to celebrate the 60th anniversary of the country with General Secretary Kim Jong-il, we celebrated on our own," Kim yong-Nam was quoted as saying. A US intelligence official said yesterday that Kim had apparently suffered a "health setback", possibly a stroke. "We see such reports as not only worthless, but rather as a conspiracy plot," Song il-Ho, North Korea's ambassador handling relations with Japan, told Kyodo separately. "I believe the aim is to form a public opinion on something that is not true," Mr Song was quoted as saying. "Western media have reported falsehood before."

Not content with just spreading rumours about Kim Jong's ill-health, some propaganda outlets, I mean western newspapers, have gone so far as to claim the Dear Leader is dead.

IS Kim Jong-il for real?
The question has baffled foreign intelligence agencies for years but now a veteran Japanese expert on North Korea says the "dear leader" is actually dead - and his role is played by a double.The expert says Kim died of diabetes in 2003 and world leaders, including Vladimir Putin of Russia and Hu Jintao of China, have been negotiating with an impostor.

Well I have one question for these punks. Answer me this. If Kim Jong-Il died in 2003, then how on earth could he have appeared in Team America in 2004?! Fuck yeah!

Is this man for real?

Chinese Government soft on smack

2008-09-06T01:32:00.000-07:00

If you are a recovering junkie looking to kick a jumbo-sized habit, and feel like a free rehabilitation program on sunny Hainan island, I suggest you get on a plane to China now. This from the NY Times:

An elephant that became addicted to heroin at the hands of illegal traders will return home after three years of rehabilitation, the Chinese state media said Thursday. The elephant, Xiguang, a 4-year-old male, became addicted after the traders captured him on the China-Myanmar border in March 2005. They fed him bananas laced with heroin as bait and to pacify him, the official Xinhua News Agency reported. When he was found two months later in southwest China, he was suffering from withdrawal. He received methadone at a center on Hainan Island and recovered, Xinhua said

I find this article especially fascinating for several reasons. 1) Traders fed an elephant bananas laced with heroin. Besides the fact I thought tranquilisers were all the rage these days, where did these traders get their hands on heroin? Is there a corruption angle there? 2) Since when did the NY Times uncritically reprint a story about somebody "undergoing treatment" with the blessing of the CCP? 3) Where is the political angle? Was the elephant "re-educated" for his political views? Did he "write a letter of self-criticism," in the manner of the Chinese soccer players who went to have a bath in a hotel room with several prostitutes, girlfriends, and groupies because the water in their team hotel was cold? Was the elephant under house arrest? Were his rights violated? Did he have suspected links to the Dalai Lama?

As Alice in Wonderland observed after her own mind-altering experiences, this just gets curiouser and curiouser. There is a big, juicy story under all that Xinhua spin. Slopppy journalism, NYT, sloppy journalism....

The buzz about Beijing

2008-09-05T20:43:00.000-07:00

Earlier this year, the Olympics looked in trouble. The protests in France, the US and other places following the riots in Tibet sparked off a wave of nationalistic fury inside the Middle Kingdom that showed the world the ugly side of a country coming to grips with being the centre of the world's attention. For a while, it looked as though nothing would be able to change this perception of China. It seemed this Olympics was destined to go down as one of the more controversial and bitter in history.

Then in a curious twist of fate, the Sichuan earthquake struck with such a blind ferocity that the criticisms, questions, and rage vanished overnight. Questions over the Chinese Government's attitudes to their citizens were quelled by its super-fast reaction to assist the stricken area. The sight of Wen Jiabao on the frontlines of the aid effort earned him the respect of a nation, and the Government a much improved perception in other parts of the world.

Then came the Games themselves. Despite mutterings over the 'protest zones' in which protests were not allowed, the foreign media army seemed to spend more time eating M&Ms than looking for cutting-edge stories. The media were swept up in the ride, and after the initial loud complaints about internet restrictions fell largely in line with the image the Chinese Government was trying to project.

After the Games, the prospect of putting on a show as efficient and impressive as Beijing has seen the British media shaking in their little space boots.

Now the WSJ has just published an article saying that recent survery have found people who watched the Games have this impression:

According to an online survey conducted by the Nielsen Co. of viewers in 16 countries after the closing ceremony, seven in ten said Beijing appeared more modern and high-tech than they had expected. About half of those surveyed by Nielsen also came away with a very good or somewhat good impression of Beijing’s physical environment.

Remembering where we in terms of international perception of China, Beijing, and the Chinese Government in March of this year - six short months ago - and its scarcely believable how much people around the world have changed their views. Of course, part of that changing of perception came at the cost of an enormous human tragedy, but it is nonetheless impressive, and, I think, something that few pundits would have predicted. The Games have unexpectedly and down a very twisted path, achieved an international PR boost for China that would make the Government very satisfied. Overall, (and remembering that ALL host nations get criticised) I would give BOCOG and the Government a B+ for the change in international perceptions they have achieved.

I want to go to North Korea

2008-09-03T22:29:00.000-07:00

One of the downsides of a world where internet makes information and communication instant and aeroplanes make worldwide travel a matter of hours is the fact that there are few places left on the planet that are really, truly foreign. In fact, the only three I can think of off the top of my head are North Korea, Bhutan, and Hollywood. North Korea is accessible for westerners, but expensive, and visits are tightly controlled. So I'm hanging out for the day when the gates inevitably swing open a little wider. And this article gives me reason for hope:

China Confirms N. Korea as Tourist Destination
The Chinese government has designated North Korea a tourist destination, said the Xinhua News agency Wednesday. According to Xinhua, in a recent meeting in Pyongyang, China National Tourism Administration notified North Korean authorities of its decision.

Who knows when North Korea will be properly accessible for westerners. But I look forward to that day.

Tibetan resistance, the CIA and the murky swamp of history

2008-08-31T23:30:00.000-07:00

This story of the CIA's support of Tibetan resistance against the PRC is not often told in English-speaking media, but one you will often hear CCP supporters bring up, often in conjunction with allegations of the old chestnut WMB (western media bias). WMB is the Chinese version of WMD.

It's a cracking tale and an interesting look at how the US viewed mainland China in the couple of decades after the establishment of the People's Republic. It's also drives home the point of how utterly self-interested and lacking in prinicpal international geo-politics is and always has been.

I watched a documentary on this topic last year and remember one Tibetan fighter recalling how betrayed he felt when the US stopped aiding their cause. It was at that point, he said, that he and his comrades realised that the US had never intended to really help the Tibetans still pushing for independence - but just give them enough weapons and training to be a nuisance to the PRC as part of their wider strategic interests.

I must say I'm quite impressed by how well researched this WSJ article seems to be.

Revolt of the Monks
How a Secret CIA Campaign Against China 50 Years Ago Continues to Fester; A Role for Dalai Lama's Brother
By PETER WONACOTTAugust30, 2008
DARJEELING, India --
Chodak, an 83-year-old former monk, fled Tibet in the wake of a bloody Chinese invasion more than 50 years ago. Today, he spends his days trimming wool carpets at a refugee center perched above the tranquil tea plantations of this Indian hill town. The plight of Tibetan exiles like Chodak, and their Buddhist message of nonviolence, has drawn world-wide sympathy to their cause.

Tibet's history of resistance
But Chodak's story has a twist.
He's one of the last surviving guerrilla fighters who took up arms against the Chinese during a little-known chapter in Tibet's history. His life has been one of war, not peace. Starting in the late 1950s, the U.S. Central Intelligence Agency trained scores of Tibetans, many of them monks, and then air dropped them back to their country with weapons and wireless radios. The linchpin of the operation was an older brother of the Dalai Lama, the spiritual leader of 2.7 million Tibetans and today a Nobel Prize-winning symbol of peaceful resistance. "We were fighting to protect Buddhism from those who wanted to harm it," said Chodak in an interview, his eyes now clouded with cataracts. These days, armed
with little more than his message of peace and the occasional chortle at Beijing's expense, the 73-year-old Dalai Lama enjoys the upper hand in an international public-relations war. He inspires protests that embarrass the Chinese government around the world, including during the recently concluded Beijing Olympics. He also provokes over-the-top denunciations from Chinese officials. During the unrest in March, Tibet's Communist Party Secretary, Zhang Qingli, accused the Dalai Lama of sabotaging the region's stability and described the Buddhist leader as a "a wolf in monk's clothes, a devil with a human face."

The article goes on the describe how intimately involved in the resistance the Dalai Lama's immediate family was, and how the US support for the resistance waned due becoming bogged down in Vietnam, and then stopped altogether with Nixon's recognition of China.

I would like to take this opportunity to say something deep and profound, something well thought-out and insightful, something maybe even intelligent. But the best I can come up with is this:

Politics is a dirty business.

Lives well-lived

2008-08-30T03:49:00.000-07:00

Some people truly live amazing lives. The National has this story on two American men with the same first name who lived most of their lives in in China and developed an intense dislike for each other. These opening sentences give an enticing taste of the article's content.

Around the time of the Chinese Revolution in 1949, a small crowd of foreign sympathisers came to help build the Maoist dream. Sixty years later, one of them is still there.

Thanks to Danwei for finding all this fascinating stuff.

Justice for the grandmas

2008-08-30T03:17:00.000-07:00

In a classic face saving maneuver, the Chinese government has relented on the issue of punishing grandmas for trying to protest in the protest areas set up for the Olympic Games. This is from the Oz:

TWO Chinese grandmothers sentenced to re-education through labour for applying to protest during the Olympics will escape punishment.

The Beijing municipal committee which sentenced them less than two weeks ago revoked its order yesterday, said Human Rights in China.
Neighbours Wu Dianyuan, 79, and Wang Xiuying, 77, were handed the one-year punishment after they asked several times for permission to protest in one of the three areas where authorities said they would allow such activities during the Olympic Games.

The elderly women said they wanted to protest as they had not received compensation after their homes were demolished by the Beijing city government seven years ago.

The two said they had applied five times to stage protests at official Olympic protest zones.

But instead of getting approval for their protest, they were both slapped with the one-year sentences of re-education through labour for disturbing public order.
Under the police order, the pair were spared immediate detention but would have been sent off to camp if they caused more trouble.

Thank God the all-powerful benevolent grandma central committee has let the Chinese Government off the hook...

A Freudian slip

2008-08-29T00:35:00.000-07:00

Now this is possibly the most amazing article I have ever seen in an official Chinese news publication. Found by Zhongnanhai, it was published on China Radio International's website.

The Dalai Lama's Demons

Friday 08 August 2008

The Dalai Lama is respected worldwide for his peaceful philosophy. Today, some exiled Tibetans, shunned by their peers, no longer believe in his leadership. A controversial buddhist deity lies at the heart of the dispute. (Report: C. Henry, N. Haque)
Tibet’s exiled spiritual leader, the Dalai Lama, is revered as a hero by his people and respected world-wide for his peaceful philosophy. Today, however, there are cracks at the heart of his community. A minority of Tibetans exiled in India, including monks, no longer believe in his leadership, and are shunned by their peers. France 24 correspondents Capucine Henry and Nicolas Haque take a closer look into the widening rift that threatens to tear apart the Tibetan people.
In a hitherto peaceful village of Tibetan refugees in southern India, certain monks can no longer enter their monastery, and are banned from stores and public places, including hospitals. Their crime? Revering a god considered a demon by the Dalai Lama.
The controversial Buddhist deity of Dorje Shugden lies at the heart of the conflict. Considered by some as an enlightened tutelary deity and by others as a malevolent force, it was labeled a demon by the Dalai Lama himelf. He made this clear last January, in a speech imbued with rare violence at a Tibetan university in Southern India.
A historic speech “I have meditated and considered (my decision to put aside the Shugden) at length in my soul and spirit before coming to the right decision”, he said. People have killed, lied, fought each other and set things alight in the name of this deity. These monks must be expelled from all monasteries. If they are not happy, you can tell them that the Dalai Lama himself asked that this be done, and it is very urgent.”
The speech was a historic moment in the history of Tibetan Buddhism, and the beginning of a schism which could exclude the four million Tibetans followers of Shugden. A few weeks after the Dalai Lama's speech, Shugden monks could no longer enter monasteries. They regroup themselves outside village walls and meditate on why the Dalai Lama has excluded him.
“Can the Dalai Lama really ban an entire religion?” asks one. “We are in the right, he’s the one who is being incoherent. On one hand, he’s always preaching freedom of religion and compassion, but on the other he’s forbidding us to worship the god we choose”, says another.
Apartheid in Buddhist land Photos of Shugden leaders are posted on city walls, branding them as traitors. Signs at the entrance of stores and hospitals forbid Shugden followers from entry. It’s apartheid, in Buddhist land.
Our reporters followed an ostracized Buddhist monk as he tried to affront the fellow villagers who have banned him. “We’re not violating Buddha’s teachings, and we’re excluded from everywhere just because of our religion” he complains.
“Aren’t you ashamed of betraying the Dalai Lama? You’re a monk! He is our only pillar, the only person we can count on,” he is asked.
In India, Shugden followers are forced to go into hiding. “I fled my house three days ago” says an old woman taken in by a family 300 kilometers away from her home. “I was the only Shugden in my village. Every day I grew more afraid of attacks.I had to block my door with stones for people not to break into my house”.
Pro-Chinese ‘traitors’ Behind this Shugden witch-hunt lies the fear of Chinese infiltration in the ranks of the Tibetan refugees. In the northern Indian city of Dharamsala, home of the Dalai Lama and the exiled Tibetan government, Shugden followers, with their open Chinese sympathies are considered a political threat.
“The Shugden and the Chinese are obviously allies,” says the Tibetan Prime Minister, professor Samdhong Rinpoche. “Their cults all over the world are financed by the Chinese”. He adds that “people are afraid of Shugden violence. They are like terrorists, they will stop at nothing, everyone knows this.” To prove his point, he shows our reporters the photo of the murder of a leading Buddhist monk and two of his disciples in 1997. Tibetans are certain the Shugden are behind the murder.
A leading Shugden figure, Mahalama Losbang Yechi, defends his links with the Chinese community: “I approve the Chinese presence in Tibet. What we are living with the Dalai Lama today shows how authoritarian his theocratic regime must have been in the past. It was much more violent than what Tibetans are living today under Chinese rule.”
Yechi has filed a lawsuit against the Dalai Lama in an Indian high court for religious persecution. He denies acting on the orders of Chinese authorities.
Shugden followers, willingly or not, have become the symbol of a schism that threatens the struggle for Tibetan autonomy. For that, thousands of refugees have begun to pay a price.

Wow. That was a trip. I would be interested in knowing would run through the head of Joe 爱国 when he reads sentences like "The Dalai Lama is respected worldwide for his peaceful philosophy." This is the most "anti-Chinese" article I have ever seen in a Chinese publication. Zhongnanhai speculates that this was put up by accident, and I have to say I tend to agree with that sentiment.

Me, victim, you, aggressor

2008-08-27T20:23:00.000-07:00

The arm of patriotic education is long and sinewy. From Diana Fu, writing in the NY Times:

Training a massive army of volunteers is not just about showcasing China’s might; it is also a great medium for extending patriotic education. Through volunteering, students are learning a political lesson about China’s place in the world. Olympic student training manuals include sections titled “China’s Olympics journey is the classic text of patriotic education” and “Patriotism is the core spirit of Zhonghua sports.” Every volunteer can track China’s journey from humiliation to triumph. Here’s an extract from the training manual which every student volunteer is required to memorize:
Before 1949, Chinese athletes formally participated in three Olympic Games (10th, 11th and 14th), and came back with no medals each time. A foreign newspaper published a cartoon of a group of sickly-looking Chinese attired in long gowns and sporting the queue. They were carrying a gigantic “0″ on their shoulders. This cartoon was titled, “the sick man of East Asia”… The July 13, 2001, victory marks the
climax of the Chinese nation’s rise from “sick man of Asia” to strong nation status… Beijing, China, finally won the right to host the 29th Games in 2008. Beijing is ebullient! China is ebullient! The Chinese diaspora is ebullient!

So will the Olympic-sized dose of gold medals cure China of its western cartoon-inspired "sick man of East Asia" self-diagnosis? For the dream of not reading such ebullient jingoism, I sure hope not. Then what would I write about?

But seriously, if public discussion ever does get freed up in this country one thing that will (hopefully) be fascinating to watch is the battle to tell the dominant historical narrative. My cynical side tells me that what will emerge is something not very different from what is in this article, a teleological retrospective account of China being a hapless victim of foreign machinations, followed by the CCP saving the country, followed by a long and necessary period of authoritarian capitalism, etc etc. However, it will be interesting to see, in particular, how much more the events of the Cultural Revolution are brought into mass consciousness, and what light they are viewed in. Equally fascinating will be whether more nuanced views regarding Xinjiang, Tibet, and Taiwan become publicly accepted.

Journo says it as it is

2008-08-25T05:24:00.000-07:00

Qu: What has the power to turn a bunch of rabid China-bashers into frolicking panda huggers?
A: The soothing capitalist sweetness of M&Ms.

I don't think I'm the only one who has noted with a little surprise the changing of the tune in the western press over the last couple of weeks when it comes to reporting on China. It was as if all the armchair critics who had been firing journalistic missiles at everything Middle Kingdom-related for the last eight months had suddenly become complimentary, if not downright fawning, at the way the event was handled - and by extension the dastardly commie government that ran the show wasn't so bad after all. It was only two weeks ago that the sinister foreign media were making totally unreasonable claims about internet access, yet today it's all about how extraordinarily efficient the whole shebang was. I was delighted to find a refreshingly candid article in the Irish Times explaining this weird phenomenon.

More than at any other Olympic celebration , we were aware of being tranquillised - we lived in a theme park, not China, writes Tom Humphries
THE MAIN transportation area at the Olympic press centre is a grid several football pitches in area with buses going hither and thither from designated stops. To get to the shuttle that whisks us nightly to our plush seven-star hotel suite, we must go past the stop that whisks other people to the Beijing Foreign Experts Institute. We can't help but feel a pang of envy.
All of us here, after all, are foreign experts, unblushing about painting an overall picture of China after a couple of weeks spent within the Disney on steroids environment that the Olympics provides.
In truth we are the least-qualified people on earth to comment on China and the games. We can only compare and contrast these Beijing games as seen from within the bubble with the experience of being within other bubbles.
First the bubble. You know it is there but the Chinese, in a masterstroke of overstaffing, have solved the security problems that can occasionally make the Olympic experience (or lately just working in Croke Park) so oppressive, intimidating and so involving of queue.
Exposure to the Salt Lake City winter games and to the Athens Olympics left a trace impression of a security world gone mad. Nightclub bouncers and men with machine guns had inherited the earth. Long, long queues formed to get into any arena or press centre. There were no words better guaranteed to sink the hearts of hacks at the back of an epic security queue than the demand that all cameras and laptops be removed from bags for inspection.
The Chinese have solved it all. We come down to the hotel lobby, scan our danglers in (sounds more exciting than it is: our danglers are our accreditation cards, which dangle from our necks like cowbells). Once that is done (10 seconds max), including wild cheery hellos and good days and thank yous and you're welcomes, we step on to a bus and drive down a special Olympic highway and become part of the Olympic family in the pristine Olympic green.
And we can go from venue to venue on our dedicated Olympic highways without ever leaving the Olympic bubble or needing to be searched again. Our meals, our banking, our technology, our haircuts, our massage requirements, our visits to McDonalds - all these things are provided within the bubble. Sometimes we come out and it has been raining. Other times we come out and the government has been oppressing. Of the two conditions, rain makes more impact on us. We berate the athletes for not making an articulate expression of political concern like Smith and Carlos in 1968, but in the bubble we are just as soothed and self-absorbed.
In terms of being hermetically sealed off from the host community, these games feel qualitatively different from their recent counterparts. The Olympic venues don't groan under the weight of merchants' tables flogging mountain ranges of licensed souvenir gear. In parts of Beijing, the Olympics are practically invisible.
Perhaps because the Chinese people are so overwhelmingly decent and friendly without ever being cloying about it, we find ourselves within our Truman Show compound trying to re-educate ourselves and to help things along for China by maintaining a sunny Olympic spirit.
You give little things a pass. You can't get Amnesty sites or the Huffington Post on the web within the press centres, but we are busy anyway. That little girl miming because she was cuter than the girl who was actually singing well - The Irish Times often uses other people's photo-bylines on my pieces for the same reason.
Even the charmingly Kafkaesque idea that there would be three special areas reserved in Beijing for people who wanted to protest about things, but that those people would have to apply to the local authorities for permission to protest (no permissions were granted among the 77 applications), almost became darkly humorous with the news that several applicants for the right to protest had been arrested, among them two old ladies.
If we are to be frank, the human rights violation we fret about the most is that the shop in the main press centre stocks no other type of chocolate except Snickers bars and M&Ms - and they disappear quickly once word gets around that a new consignment has arrived.
We live in a big theme park, not in China. Those of us who came to this country to work at the games don't even have visas. Our danglers identify us as special at the airport - Olympic family. More than at any other Olympic celebration we are aware of being tranquillised and we are gulled by the experience, soothed and made passive.
China has planned and constructed these games to soothe us. It exposes us to the friendliest, most helpful security people in the world, the warmest citizens and their touching innocent pride. They smile hugely when they throw Snickers bars at us! And our reservations and protest plans feel like bad manners.
We roam the huge Olympic green like contented buffalo. Past the wonderful red glow of the Bird's Nest and the gloopy blue Water Cube, and the quiet thrilling efficiency of everything, and we are not in China but China is selling a version of itself to us.
We remember all the promises made in Moscow seven years ago and realise that China has delivered over and over again in terms of the infrastructure of these games and, rather cynically, hasn't blinked on much else. But we can see nothing and hear nothing, so while we are here, we do nothing and hope those who hope for more understand. We were queuing for M&Ms. Okay?

And thus the bias of the western press has been proved. If you feed them enough M&Ms, they will definitely turn a blind eye to assaults on a few of their colleagues.

Actually, this should come as no surprise. The psychoactive powers of chocolate have been well-documented scientifically. Chocolate contains around 380 chemicals, some of which act as cannaboid mimics and latch onto receptors in the brain, triggering a reaction not unlike that of tetrahydrocannabinol (THC). The relevant lipid, Anandamide, is perhaps the cause of this unprecedented wave of panda-hugging engulfing the western media.

Your blogger would suggest that in admitting his and his colleague's journalistic laziness, Tom Humphries has in fact stumbled upon a great TRUTH - that the Chinese Government deliberately packed the international media centre full of opiate-inducing snack machines IN ORDER TO STOP ANY JOURNALISTIC INVESTIGATION OUTSIDE OF THE INTERNATIONAL MEDIA CENTER.

And in terms of their objectives - you can't but help admire the vile cunning of the Chinese Communist Party. Of all the choices of brain-affecting substances available, they chose the most inane, yet effective. They could have packed their vending machines with cocaine, ecstasy, or heroin, but these drugs are just so democratic. Nobody would believe you can get better dope in Beijing than the great cities of Berlin, London or New York. Opium was a possibility - but it's just so god-damn imperialistic. And caffeine - well that's been known to give journalists energy instead of put them to sleep. Energy that could be spent on chasing down a story.

Now that Guerrilla Snorefare has uncovered this slimy sweet-toothed scandal, the question must be posed: Just where will the Chinese Government stop?

It must be said though, that there may be more than one factor at play. Perhaps part of the reason the English press, at least, is so complimentary is because they are packing their dacks* at the prospect of being humiliated by the efficiency of the Beijing organisers. As was noted by The Independent following the closing ceremony:

It was hard not to feel a shiver of sympathy for Boris Johnson as he was handed maybe the heaviest baton ever passed on in the history of organised sport. Implicit in the eight-minute handover sequence was that if London was to succeed it would do so on its own terms – and its vastly inferior budget.

Roll on 2012.

*This Australian slang refers to defecating in your pants out of a heightened sense of fear.

Guerrilla's astute predictions come to pass

2008-08-23T22:28:00.000-07:00

The Games are over, the verdict is in, and the critics (by this I mean me) are unanimous. The gold medal of the Games (and by this I mean the most astute predictions of how the final medal count would unfold) have been won by none other than myself. It is now my distinct pleasure to quote from my post on the first Sunday of the Games - that's two freakin' weeks ago - about which country would rack up the most medals.

So in the interests of insightful commentary and cutting-edge analysis that you've come to expect from GS, allow myself to quote.....myself. Following a brilliant expose on China's ancient plans for Olympic domination I said:

The rest, as they say, is history. Except in China, of course, where it's 5000 years of history. And if you had any doubts, I feel I need to hardly point out to you the incredible effectiveness of this wily scheming. Just check out the medal table. Here is my prediction, at the end of Day Three. The US may win most medals, but China will top the gold medal count.

1.	China (map)	49	20	28	97
2.	United States (map)	34	37	36	107

Sometimes I feel my talent is being wasted in the stuffy confines of the advertising world.

Using biased western media as supporting proof

2008-08-22T04:33:00.000-07:00

One thing I find consistently odd in Chinese news publications is the bipolar attitude they have toward foreign, specifically western media. On the one hand they are extremely quick to claim unfair and biased (that's a word I've heard way too much this year) points of view regarding China, on the other they seem to crave positive feedback. It makes for a very interesting mix, especially when the China Daily starts quoting a French publication giving a positive review of the air quality.

Measures taken by Beijing to tackle air pollution before the Olympic Games have proved to be effective, setting at rest previous concerns over the issue, an article in the French sports daily L' Equipe said Thursday.

It was only a few short months ago that French people in Beijing were afraid to identify themselves as such because of the brouhaha over Parisiens expressing their democratic right to make public protests over the torch relay. In addition French media were given a lashing in Chinese press about their heinous misrepresentations of the glorious motherland. Nicholas Sarkozy even briefly became No 1 most hated foreign leader when he suggested Olympic boycotts may be a sensible response to China's handling of the riots in Tibet. Now a French newspaper's positive response is given as definitive proof of the general good quality of Beijing's Olympic air. I would like to take this opportunity to say: WTF?

iTuning out: The CCP has had enough of listening

2008-08-22T01:19:00.000-07:00

This article from The Oz:

APPLE'S online music store, iTunes, has been blocked in China after more than 40 Olympic athletes downloaded a pro-Tibet album from the site.Consumers in China began inundating Apple help forums on Monday, saying that they could not access iTunes. Earlier on the same day the US-based International Campaign for Tibet (ICT) announced that 46 athletes from America, Europe and even Beijing had used the site to download Songs for Tibet, which had been offered to them free.
The disappearance of iTunes behind the “Great Firewall” of China comes in the midst of the Beijing Olympics when the Government promised free and unfettered internet access for journalists. While it has lifted blocks on some sites, many are still inaccessible. IT analysts said there was no doubt that the store had been blocked and that it was not merely experiencing a technical fault. Apple acknowledged that there was a problem but refused to comment. Yuna Huang, the company’s Beijing publicist, said: “We’ve seen the situation but can’t offer any more information.” The censorship could backfire.
Mr Wohl said that since the iTunes site had gone down many people in Beijing, including athletes, had asked for the album. “Obviously there are a million different ways of getting an album to somebody,” he said.

What a great example of shooting oneself in the foot. Joe 爱国 is never going to be interested in a load of western imperialist claptrap such as an album with the title of "Songs for Tibet." You may as well give a southern redneck the best of Enya. The only people who will be listening to this kind of thing will be idealistic members of the international community. As such, the Net Nanny is therefore displaying an extraordinary amount of pettiness trying to control what information foreigners have access to. And like so many things that have happened during these Games, they have created two stories worthy of international attention out of one. Originally, there was just a story about an album. Now there is a story about an album and how it was blocked - much more interesting and newsworthy.

But probably the most disturbing thing is the fact that "boycotting Apple" over this ridiculously trivial matter has already rasied its murky one-eyed head. If this nitpicking pettiness is going to be a recurring theme every time a multinational stops calling black white because Chinese netizens and the Government say so, then I can't see too many companies taking a moral stand in the face of the market. But having said that, considering how quickly the Carrefour "boycott" died down earlier this year, it seems apart from making a loud noise about it the average Chinese person doesn't care enough to let these kinds of things stand in the way of their purchasing decisions. Which is a good thing. Chinese consumers, I have some faith in you.

Protesters perplexed

2008-08-18T22:17:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, one comes across an article so cautiously written it makes satire redundant.

77 protest applications received after August 1

BEIJING - Beijing authorities have received 77 applications for demonstrations since August 1, a spokesperson with the municipal public security bureau said on Monday.These applications involved
149 people, including three persons from overseas. Most of the applicants applied to protest in public for issues like labor disputes, medical disputes or inadequate welfares, the spokesperson said.
Seventy-four applications have been withdrawn so far, because the problems those applicants contended for were properly addressed by relevant authorities or departments through consultations, added the spokesperson.Two other applications have been suspended because
their procedures were incomplete, the spokesperson said. In one of such cases, for example, the applicant applied to take children to the demonstration, which is against China's law.According to China's law on demonstrations and protests, children are not eligible to take part in any demonstrations because they do not have independent will, nor can they be liable for their behaviors."The applicants (whose applications have been suspended) have been told to provide information of the eligible participants, and provide the adequate papers as required," the spokesperson said. "It doesn't mean their applications have been rejected." The Chinese law requires demonstrators submit their requests at least five days in advance and detail the intention and topic of the protest, as well as the basic information of the participants.The one remaining application has been vetoed by the public security authorities, as it is in violation of China's law on demonstrations and protests, the spokesperson said without elaboration.

Cops crush my Olympic dreams

2008-08-18T01:08:00.000-07:00

Flushed with success from our clandestine Friday felony at the women's beach volleyball (see below) a motley crew of assorted ne'er do wells and myself assembled at the Rickshaw yesterday afternoon to plan further hijinks.

The target was the men's hockey between Aus and the Netherlands, and the plan was simple: find some Brazilians, slit their throats, and steal their tickets and passports. Failing that, we also hoped just to purchase them in the normal way from any scalper we could find.

The first problem proved to be of a geographical nature. Our cabbie happened to be one of those ubiquitous cranially-challenged clowns who didn't have a clue of our destination and so dropped us off near the Bird's Nest. Several phone calls and conversations beginning with 那个，and 这个 later, and we found another taxi who could take us to the actual location.

The temporary setback overcome, we hovered near the entrance to the stadium trying to attract the attention of those shady deviants who ply the scalping trade. And attract attention we did - only not from scalpers. Merely moderately obese middle-aged men who wished to have their pics taken with the females of our party.

Our plan thwarted, we sulked awhile in sullen rage before hitting up some dim sum and karaoke. Not too bad an alternative, but it didn't really stack up against a night at the Olympics. And a very puzzling turn of events considering the ease at which we picked up tickets on Friday night. It was a mystery wrapped in a fortune cookie, that is, until this morning when I saw this article at Xinhua.

Beijing police has seized in a single day 110 scalpers who illegally sold Olympics tickets at competition venues, according to media reports.
About 340 Olympics tickets were found to be sold through illegal trading by scalpers on Friday, including 17 foreigner nationals, the Legal Daily reports.

Curses!

And so unnecessary. The scalpers are like the vultures of the Olympic savanna. Without them hundreds and thousands (more) tickets will not be used, and hundreds and thousands more pics showing row upon row of empty seats to audiences around the world are going to reinforce the belief that this is the No Fun Games.

And so I look at you, the noble protectors of law and order in this fair city, with big, sad eyes, and ask one pitiful question: Why?

Post script: To make matters worse, the Xinhua article also had a typo. You wood never see me do such things.

Western media continues to bash China

2008-08-16T22:15:00.000-07:00

In a desperate attempt to keep the criticism of China up at all costs, the western media has gone to the extraordinary lengths of researching the internet to see what Chinese people are saying about the Games.

The mystery of the half-filled stands at many events at the 2008 Olympic Games has been solved, according to Chinese internet users, who say it is the result of a policy to prevent the gathering of large and possibly uncontrollable crowds.
They claim ticket sales to the public were secretly restricted. Blocks of tickets went to government departments, Communist party officials or state-owned companies, which have quietly obeyed orders not to hand them out. “People are so angry because they slept all night outside ticket booths and got nothing and now they see this,” said one blogger, Jian Yu.

Can you believe it? When will the western media accept that the glorious Chinese nation and its 5000 years of history have put on the most incredible Games ever?

BOCOG and international media to communicate by telepathy

2008-08-16T10:21:00.000-07:00

Communication is now at an all time high between the international press and the Olympic organisers.

Beijing Olympic organisers have abandoned their regular daily press conferences following a series of heated exchanges between officials and journalists in the past four days.
Beijing spokesman Sun Weide said there would be no press conference on Saturday because the Olympics were running very smoothly.

Swimming's dirty laundry hung out to dry

2008-08-16T07:56:00.000-07:00

If you were wondering at the mysteriously fast emergence of Chinese swimmers at this Games (you probably weren't, but anyway), look no further.

JESSICAH Schipper's coach has admitted selling the training program used by his protege to the Chinese swimmer who produced the race of her career to deny the Queenslander's dream of gold.
In a revelation that will rock Australian swimming, coach Ken Wood says he sold his top-secret training methods - which transformed Schipper into the world's best 200m butterflyer - to the Chinese coach of Liu Zige.

Wood, who is in Beijing as one of the coaches with the Australian Olympic team, admitted he received "big money" from the Chinese for the information.

"They pay for the programs," Wood said yesterday. "They pay good money, big money. I wouldn't help them for nothing."
But Wood denied betraying Schipper, saying he severed all ties with China after Australia's Olympic trials in March.

The 78-year-old would not reveal how much China paid for his private program - based on 40 years of swimming knowledge - but said the poor remuneration of Australia's top swim coaches left him little choice but to seek international customers.

Wood's program contains detailed information on stroke technique, weight training, diet and preparation for elite swimmers.

In an explosive interview with The Sunday Telegraph, Wood spoke of heartbreak at seeing Schipper beaten by Lui.

But he confirmed receiving a series of payments from Chinese coach Jun Wei, who in turn was granted access for Liu to Wood's program and his pool, the Redcliffe High Performance Centre north of Brisbane.
Schipper finished third in her favourite event to the Chinese pair of Liu Zige and Jiao Liuyang, who both recorded remarkable improvements in their personal best times.

Fear and loathing at the women's beach volleyball

2008-08-15T22:41:00.000-07:00

It was a Thursday at the office when I felt the Olympic pull drag me in the direction of the office door. Without a clue as to what I wanted to see, I consulted my attorney. "I advise you to go to see the women's beach volleyball," he said. Then he sighed mournfully. "You do realize I'm forced to come with you."

As we arrived at Chao Yang Park, it was clear this was no ordinary law-enforcement activity. Police swarmed the scene like bees to nectar, looking for the numerous criminals, terrorists, and Tibetans undoubtedly infesting our midst and perpetrating the most heinous crimes as we speak. But we had a dirty little secret of our own. That's right. We had no tickets.

Surreptitiously, we sidled up to people who looked shady enough to possess the contraband we so desperately sought. The guy in the shades and the trenchcoat standing next to the playgound, the nice young lady with the miniskirt, fishnets, and cigarette dangling out of her mouth, the Indian man selling Rolexes for a very good price.

Our intrepid adventure was cut short when a bunch of of brazen bronzed Brazilians walked straight up to us and said point blank "Do you need tickets?" After a few moments of haggling my attorney and I had the contraband, and I turned to find that a cop had been curiously watching the whole sordid affair.

Affecting an air of nonchalance, we strolled toward the gate and past the cop, who seemed as if he were undergoing a deep internal struggle to contain his indifference to our existence. A few minutes later, we were inside the stadium.

As for the actual event itself, I feel it can best be displayed pictorially.

A blast from the past: The Democracy Wall

2008-08-12T06:23:00.000-07:00

Rhetorical question aimed at nobody in particular: How do I write about modern calligraphy without mentioning the Democracy Wall of 1979?

The phenomenon of the 1979 Democracy Wall in Beijing now seems surreal, considering the vast social and economic changes that have taken place in China since then. But there, for a brief period, citizens gathered to read and comment upon layers of large posters painted in bold ink on all kinds of scrap and newspaper, each poster calling for civic and political reform. Within a short time Deng Xiaoping, consolidating his power as the eventual successor to Mao Zedong, suppressed the movement and the wall was moved to a distant suburb.
The short-lived Democracy Wall was the last prominent use of calligraphy as a vehicle for personal expression in the public forum, concluding a long tradition of intellectuals expressing their concerns to the seat of power in their own hand. Calligraphy—the manner of writing itself—was an essential aspect of literacy. It served as a means of displaying sincerity and erudition, with its practitioners drawing from a widely-circulated canon of masterpieces dating back as far as 1,500 years.

Unfortunately I just can't see the good people at the China Tourism and Travel Press considering that to be a healthy topic for conversation in my guidebook. I can picture the explanations now: "There was no Democracy Wall" "The Democracy Wall was not harmonious" "They were misguided people who thought democracy was superior the the Chinese system"

And with the Olympics, a still-roaring economy, and government satisfaction at heady heights, they may even be close to the truth.

Diabolical Chinese performance-enhancing plot exposed

2008-08-11T09:12:00.000-07:00

In a stunningly devious display of satanic.... deviousness, China has hijacked the colour red in order to gain a statistical advantage over their Olympic opponents. (The world)

Yes folks, this is what is has come down to. A century of planning to get the Games to China, a communist revolution sixty years ago to ensure that red would be the color of the flag when it finally happened, and 5000 years of history have all crystallized into this one event.

But actually, the scheme goes much deeper than that. Several thousand years ago, the Chinese built a wall to keep meddlesome outsiders away so they could develop their sporting skills uninterrupted. Then they invented sophisticated farming techniques and started to breed like rabbits, waiting for the time they could claim a full 20% of the world's population to launch a serious medal assault. Cunningly, they created gunpowder and exported it, knowing full well that barbarians would use it to kill each other and keep their reproduction rates down. They established ping-pong training centres at Shaolin Si and Leshan where super warrior-paddlers honed their lethal speed by smashing needles through plates of glass. They practiced their gymnastics skills by flying through the air and running along walls. Then, in a brilliant twist of psychoanalytical mastery, China created the worst soccer (football, if you will) team in the world. Embarrassment, humiliation, and loss followed. The anger of the people knew no bounds. Defeat after defeat stoked the nationalistic hunger for victory. The red flag burned like a raging fire in the hearts of the people, desperate to be quenched.

After 5 thousand years of history, I mean training, the gold campaign was almost ready. But something was missing. Victory seemed inevitable. The people were becoming too complacent. They lacked a certain....focus. Deep in Zhongnanhai, an ancient sage counseled the Central Committee. Although he was in failing health, he had one last edict to issue. "To give the people the drive they lack," he said, "You must find them a common enemy. Look no further than the western media." With these final words, the ancient one went to take his afternoon nap.

Bemused by the old man's words, the Central Committee carefully considered the problem. After a few rounds of ping-pong and some baijiu, Hu Jintao snapped his fingers. "I've got it!" he said. "We'll let some of the Lhasans off the leash for a while. Then we'll clear out the foreign media. Then we'll make our torch relay go all around the world, and express our complete surprise at the protests that follow. We'll also send some goons and thugs to protect it! The western media is sure to go ape, and when they do, we'll claim it's all a plot against China!"

The other members were shocked at the audacity of the plan. "Jintao, you old bastard" said Wen Jiabao,"If the people knew how brilliant you were, I'd lose my Facebook status as China's favourite politician."

The rest, as they say, is history. Except in China, of course, where it's 5000 years of history. And if you had any doubts, I feel I need to hardly point out to you the incredible effectiveness of this wily scheming. Just check out the medal table. Here is my prediction, at the end of Day Three. The US may win most medals, but China will top the gold medal count.

The delicate dance of diplomacy

2008-08-11T01:36:00.000-07:00

This rather telling quote regarding the weekend's China/US basketball match caught my eye in the Newsweek Beijing Beat blog:

The U.S. President had been licking his lips over this showdown for some time. A month ago on the sidelines of the G8 Summit in Tokyo, amidst talk about strategic issues like North Korean and Iran, Bush requested tickets to the game from his Chinese counterpart Hu Jintao. There was talk that Hu, though not known to be much of hoops follower, might show up as well. Instead the FM Yang was Bush's escort for the night.

Good to see the world's most powerful man keeps his eye on the ball. However, it must be said that the Prez seems to have cleaned up his act with his sloppy quotes in recent years, which is a relief after some of the pre-Iraq war rhetoric. I would go so far as to say he sounded statesmanlike at the opening of the new American Embassy in Beijing last Friday, not making any silly bellicose sports-related predictions (a good thing, judging by the medal count at the moment) and talking up friendship, mutual cooperation, and fairy floss like a seasoned diplomat.

Beijing fails to boogey

2008-08-08T22:33:00.000-07:00

The Opening Ceremony looked pretty good last night from what I saw on TV, but in Beijing the atmosphere had all the liveliness of a sloth and a tortoise beating each other to death. After a BBQ lunch a group of us went to Chao Yang Park to watch the Opening Ceremony live. Upon arriving at 6pm or so, there was only a small crowd, loads of volunteers with nothing to do, and a huge screen, that was not on. We were then informed it would not be on at all.

So we went to Ritan Park. Same thing. My flatmate went to Wangfujing, near Tiananmen Square, where he said there were a number of big screens, but only one or two on. And those that were on did not have any sound.

The Opening Ceremony is the biggest party in the world. If the government here couldn't loosen up a little for that, what are they going to loosen up for?

Rare air

2008-08-07T04:08:00.001-07:00

This was the image that confronted me from my office window at 10am on the 7th August - 36 hours from the start of the Games.

Disgusting.

To be fair, it's not always that bad. Last week it was even clear for a couple of days. But recently it has often been almost this bad.

We went for a boozy work lunch at Hou Hai this afternoon to celebrate the beginning of the Games weekend. The lack of tourists was a little surprising, even given the lack of them generally...

Talkin' 'bout calligraphy

2008-08-06T06:22:00.000-07:00

Since it is less than 48 hours until the opening ceremony, I thought I would talk about calligraphy, and specifically one of the most interesting of the ancient masters. This is an unedited extract from the guidebook I am writing...

Zhang Xu

Like the rigid, formal form of the characters they painted, the Four Masters of the Regular Script were all literati of high social status, who also served with distinction in government. The flipside of these rather stiff characters would be another Tang Dynasty artist, the drunken wild man of calligraphy, Zhang Xu (who is thought to have painted from 710-750).

In a fascinating 1300 year precursor to Jimi Hendrix playing the electric guitar with his teeth, Zhang Xu is famous for his orgies of drunken excess, in which he would pace about, shout, and soak his hair in ink in order to paint his timeless classics of wild cursive script.

Reading, (or more correctly, trying to read) “Crazy Zhang’s” fluid streams of alcohol-tinged calligraphy, it is quite eerie to imagine this ancient Chinese artist, who had a totally alien concept of the world, indulge in these seemingly modern-day western antics of artistic excess. In a strange kind of way, Crazy Zhang penchant for a tipple is a nice reflection of the fact that no matter where you are in time, location, or culture, people all have tendencies to behave in the same way.

However despite his counter-cultural tendencies, Zhang Xu did have his more restrained side. His wild cursive was in fact based on earlier Han examples, he just found that his talent had the greatest chance of being expressed to its fullest extent when he was ridiculously drunk. Furthermore, he was also adept at the more restrained style of Kaishu (Regular Script). Maybe, after all, he was less Jimi Hendrix and more Hunter S. Thompson.

The Information Games begin

2008-08-05T23:10:00.000-07:00

The Opening Ceremony of the Olympic Games will not begin for a few days, but ESPN has already picked up a story about a somewhat daring "Free Tibet" protest carried out by a foreigner.

"There was a man about 100 feet up a highway post, wearing climbing gear and a climbing helmet, holding a banner that read "Tibet Will Be Free." He also had a Tibetan flag hanging out of his backpack."

I am all for freedom of speech and the right to protest, but all this act is going to win is a lot of bad feeling. If the story makes it into any Chinese media (I doubt it will because it is too small a deal) it will be interesting to see whether ugly nationalism rears its head, or the general goodwill of the Games takes over. I'm hoping for the latter.

Doublespeak

2008-08-05T20:53:00.000-07:00

All governments do it. The Chinese Government happens to be incredibly blatant about it, probably because they can be. One of the things they have been talking up is the designation of special protest zones. However not only are these areas so far away from anywhere that they are rendered more-or-less useless, the strong likelihood remains that authorities will take down the details of protesters (not an idea I'd be comfortable with, that's for sure). On top of that, it seems that even if you want to protest in the 'correct' way, this is what may happen:

Beijing trumpeted its decision to establish special protest zones for this month’s Olympics as a demonstration of the liberties enjoyed by citizens of China’s capital. But when former residents of Beijing’s historic Qianmen district applied for permission to use one of the zones to demonstrate against the demolition of their traditional courtyard homes, police were unequivocal. They said that in order to maintain stability they would certainly not approve our protest,” said Zhang Wei, a group member whose home was levelled two years ago to make way for an upmarket retail and residential complex. The quick refusal of permission for a demonstration, even one in a city park well away from Olympic venues, underscores the determination of China's Communist government to curb dissent.

In the meantime, the amount of tourists in the city two days out from the biggest show on earth is decidedly small, and not looking to get a whole lot bigger.

"I am giving you a low price because there are no customers these days," a shop-keeper at Beijing's Hongqiao market, famous as one of the world's major retail market for pearls, grumbles after a customer has managed to beat down the price to drastic levels.
People connected to the travel industry were expecting a flood of visitors coming to Beijing two weeks before the Games. Instead, there is a small trickle of visitors just three days before the start of the Games apart from the athletes and sports officials from different participating countries.

I would like to make a (belated) suggestion to the Government that will solve both of these problems. People around the world have the opinion that these Games are going to be boring because of the micro-management of everyone's behaviour - right down to kite-flying. In order to get tourists flowing, I say the government lets people protest when and where they want. Free Tibet marches on Tiananmen Square? Student sit-ins demanding democracy at Tsinghua? I know I'd pay good money to see that, and I'll bet a lot of other foreigners would too.

Two days to go

2008-08-05T19:53:00.000-07:00

And the air is still so thick you can almost eat it.... if you wanted to get sulfur poisoning that is. A few days ago it was fine, but the last couple have been terrible. It could go either way, I think. Just like the Games themselves.

The air, I mean, plot, thickens

2008-08-04T08:49:00.000-07:00

So today the visibility out of my office window was probably the worst it has been for several weeks. The polluted fog over the city is an interesting metaphor for the sometimes murky ambience of the Games. Add to the atmosphere a thick police presence and tens of thousands of aggrieved foreign journalists and you have a volatile mixture that could well erupt at any moment. It's as difficult to see what will pan out as it is to see the next building from my office window...

A mission to nowhere

2008-08-04T07:20:00.000-07:00

This article just caught my eye in the Oz:

ONE of the Dalai Lama's top envoys says Tibetan negotiators will present Chinese negotiators with a detailed autonomy plan at their next meeting in October.

"During the eighth round (of negotiations held since 2002), it is almost about all or nothing,'' Kelsang Gyaltsen told German news magazine Der Spiegel today.

"We will present a detailed plan of how we foresee autonomy in Tibet. If the Chinese side reacts positively, one could propose specific preliminary steps, for example a pilgrimage of the Dalai Lama to China.

"Such a development could lead to a meeting between His Holiness and the Chinese president and provide decisive momentum.''

Mr Gyaltsen said he had reason to believe Beijing was ready to resolve the dispute over Tibet in negotiations.

Now, I don’t want to sound cynical or nuffin’, but how on God’s green earth is the CCP going to get away with making a pact with the man they have portrayed as the devil’s spawn for almost six decades? The hate for the Dalai Lama held by vast sections of Han Chinese is so palpable you can almost smell it. After spending decades of whipping up a cult of Lama loathing among their citizens, an agreement which sees the CCP invite the malodorous monk to the motherland is going to be a miracle on a par with the second coming.

I wish the DL's envoys the best of luck. But I think the CCP have invested too much effort in creating an imagined enemy in the form of exiled Tibetans to allow them the space to do a U-turn now. And even if in some divine act they can come to an accommodation, how are the fen qing (nationalist youth) and other Han Chinese going to take it? It might just start a revolution....

Chinese Government announces tough new anti-terrified crackdown in Tibet

2008-08-02T22:58:00.000-07:00

This just in from the Guardian:

China seeks "absolute monotony" for Olympics

In the wake of a few hundred Tibetans terrifying 1 billion Han Chinese in March, the Chinese Government has called for stronger international support in the face of these superhuman fiends of terror.

"We're absolutely terrified," said a government spokesman. "So our solution is to terrorize the terrorists. Then we'll be less terrified, and the terrorists will be too terrified to terrorize, and we'll be able to ensure a terrific terror-free Olympics. Pretty clever, eh?"

"But to do this, we need the help of the rest of the world."

When it was suggested to him that the Dalai Lama actually does not seek independence for Tibet, the spokesman was unmoved.

"It is a well known fact that the Dalai Lama has the sole of a god," he said. "We can barely control Tibet as it is. If the Dalai Lama, with his god-sole comes back to China, the s%*& is really going to hit the fan."

I smell bacon

2008-08-01T22:27:00.000-07:00

Is it just me or does there seem to be about five times the amount of cop cars on the streets these days? Must be a part of the Central Committee's efforts to welcome all the visitors.

Prez dishes out some Olympic love

2008-08-01T07:25:00.000-07:00

This just in from Xinhua.

Chinese president warns against politicizing Olympics

BEIJING -- Chinese President Hu Jintao on Friday warned that politicizing the Olympics runs counter to the Olympic spirit and will not work.

"As proof that we would never politicize the Games, we locked up a number of political dissidents," he said. "We also shipped out large numbers of the working proletariat, who are known for their tendency to form left wing political parties and stage revolutions. That kind of anti-revolutionary revolutionary thinking is clearly not in the Chinese spirit of harmony."

He went on to shrug off suggestions that the international media may not adhere to the noble journalistic principal of reporting everything exactly the way the CCP wants it to be heard.

"No problem," he said. "The Chinese people have a magical wand that can wave all political criticism away," he said. "And we'll gosh-darn use it."

He hastily assured everyone, however, that China would ensure that guests would be warmly welcomed and the Games would be enjoyable for all.

"China has always opened its door to the outside world, apart from most of its history" Hu said . "But if you're black, a Russian female, from Xinjiang, Tibet or want a visa for the Olympics, you better be careful."

Good news on the Games front

2008-07-31T08:05:00.000-07:00

Ah, something positive to talk about for a change:

Olympic fans who failed to secure tickets for the main events can now look forward to the next best thing: watching the Games on huge TV screens across the capital.

In a bid to ensure as many people as possible get to share the Olympic experience, screens will be set up at the Summer Palace, the Temple of Heaven and in the city's 24 Olympic cultural squares, Zhao Dongming, director of BOCOG's culture and ceremonies department, said yesterday.

Even of you can't make it to the stadium, like me and nearly everyone else in the city, this looks like its going to provide a pretty good time.

One world, different realities 同一个世界，不同的现实

2008-07-30T05:52:00.000-07:00

Let the Games begin. Of course, I'm not referring to the Olympic Games, which are a mere sideshow to the Information Games. In my last post I linked to an article in The Oz bemoaning the Internet restrictions at the media village (and of course everywhere else) so I was curious to see what good ole' Xinhua had to say about the matter.

[Foreign journalists are] Impressed to see no more last-minute rush in Games preparations, disappointed by the missing "real Chinese food," and sometimes annoyed by the strict security measures.

I must admit the opening para looked promising - was this a new, more relaxed and confident Xinhua who wasn't too fussed if foreign journalists were peeved - and (shock) not afraid of reporting on it?

No such luck.

For those with rich experience covering the Games, almost all were impressed with the efficiency and preparedness they saw in the Chinese capital.

The preparedness part of this statement is probably true - if you exclude air quality and internet access, which was always going to be a pretty tall order. But efficiency, I don't think so. As was reported in The Oz yesterday:

AUSTRALIAN Olympic Committee members John Coates and Kevan Gosper have been caught in the impenetrable security network that has locked down Beijing for the Games, which start in nine days.

Mr Coates had to spend his first night in Beijing at an IOC-assigned hotel instead of the athletes' village, where he is the Australian chef de mission, because he could not get his accreditation validated at Beijing airport.

Security is so tight that the AOC and the Australian embassy are concerned one of the 433 Australian athletes or 5000 tourists may be swept up in the security net and detained.

Ahh I love it. And it hasn't even begun yet. Prediction: Before the end of the Games the old chestnut of "western media bias" is going to rear its rather forlorn head from the hole it has been hiding in since the earthquake.

Olympic events to watch: Western media v CCP

2008-07-29T23:09:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: This is not giddy advocacy of "western media" which is an overly simplistic label that applies to an incredibly large amount of organisations with competing agendas, points of view, and various standards of professionalism.

Before I worked in advertising, I studied journalism. And all through that awkward year as a student posing as a real journalist in order to get stories for university publications, the one thing that sticks out in my mind is our lecturers consistently on our backs about three things. 1) Information is good. Anybody who blocks information is your enemy. 2) Always get a second opinion. 3) It is your job to keep governments, business and institutions honest. Never believe anything somebody from one of these groups tell you at face value.

On the flipside, the Chinese Gov's relationship to the media seems to be more along the lines of 1) Information is bad. If anyone, especially a maverick journalist, has information, then they are your enemy. 2) There are no second opinions. There is only one opinion that every single Chinese person can hold, and that is the one that the CCP tells them to hold. 3) It is our job to govern the country. As such, we do not need to prove our honesty to you. You take what we tell you at face value.

These two groups don't just speak different languages. They live on different planets.

So due to my background, I can sympathise with a foreign journalist's brain almost going "pop" with indignation upon hearing they can't access a lot of important foreign sites such as the BBC at the world's biggest sporting event. But when I see a quote like the one below, I can almost feel the collective heart rate of the western world's media jack up to 180 bpm and their fingers twitch in anticipation of inflicting pain on the bodies most likely responsible.

"The Chinese Government has put in place a system to spy on and gather information about every guest at hotels where Olympic visitors are staying," Kansas Senator Sam Brownback said.

The event that will be most interesting to watch at this Games is quite possibly going to be the international media boxing the Chinese Government.

The Monk meets McCain

2008-07-26T06:31:00.000-07:00

From the WSJ

With the Beijing Olympics just two weeks away, Sen. John McCain brought China to the forefront of the foreign-policy debate Friday by meeting with the Dalai Lama.

I would dearly like to know why John McCain decided to meet with Dalai Lama at this point. Presumably, the McCain strategists crunched the data and came to the conclusion it would look good to American voters. Is he trying to project a more compassionate image? Is he trying to demonstrate his political will to be firm with China? Is it a bit of both? Is he really trying to drag America's relationship with China to the forefront of the presidential contest? I guess we'll never know for sure.

However, one thing is certain. This is a political stunt. With all the problems the US is grappling with at the moment, a Tibetan monk with negligent political power is not even close to being a big concern of the next US president, even if he does attract a lot of respect worldwide.

Musings on the language

2008-07-25T23:21:00.000-07:00

This is an unedited section of the guidebook I'm writing on calligraphy and contemporary Chinese art.

The essence of written Chinese

In 1899, China was in a state of turmoil. Different factions in the court were competing for influence, the Emperor was weak and sickly, the Boxer uprising was brewing, and China was about to plunge into decades of bloody warfare and unimaginable suffering.

Wang Yirong, however, had other things on his mind. The minor government minister in Henan was suffering from severe pains in the stomach, later thought to be malaria. He consulted his pharmacist, who prescribed one of the most effective cures known to the Chinese at the time – ground up dragon bones. These were in actual fact usually ancient animal bones, often from oxen, or turtle shells.

It was incredibly fortunate that this particular pharmacist prescribed this cure to his scholarly patient. Taking the bones, Wang Jung noticed the outlines of what seemed to be a kind of writing carved into them. This “dragon bone” medicine that was being carelessly used for stomach aches turned out to be one of the earliest known examples of writing that has a direct historical correlation with modern Chinese characters.

Since then, even older examples of early Chinese characters have been found, most recently in 2003. at Daxinzhuang, also in Henan. These are also thought to be from the Shang Dynasty (1600-1100BC).

However, the uses of this “oracle bone” scripts was significantly different to what we understand the function of writing to be today. From what is currently understood, the bones and script were used in the practice of “pyromancy.” This funky name comes from the fact that bones were heated to obtain information from the spirit world. Ancient Chinese would write a question on the piece of bone, and after the priest or shaman would then ascertain from the cracks what the answer would be.

Historically speaking, writing was thought to be much more than a simple method of communication in all parts of the world. The elegantly written calligraphy in European bibles from the Middles Ages is a good example of this attitude. The reason why so much time was spent decorating and making beautiful the letters was because these words were not thought of as an abstract religious message – they were quite literally the words of God. Similarly, Scandinavian people believed that their system of writing, the runes, had supernatural origins.

It is quite fitting that these characters were used to communicate with the ancestors. Right up until very recent times, the ancestors have been worshipped and respected in Chinese society. In 2008, the government even re-introduced “Tomb-Sweeping Day” an annual event in which Chinese people visit the tombs of their ancestors to pay their respects. Because the study of written Chinese is so closely linked to the study of Chinese history, in a very tangible sense the ancestors are still talking to students of the language in the 21^st century.

Through the several thousand years that have elapsed since the time of the Shang Dynasty, written Chinese has remained remarkable consistent in its appearance. It is still possible for Chinese people now to make some sense of scripts that may be several thousand years old.

In the last 1950s and 60s, though, there were significant changes made to the structure of Chinese writing.

Perhaps a thousand years after Wang Yirong’s oracle bone scripts were originally written, in around 600 BC, the mysterious Taoist sage Lao Zi left a legacy of unknowable and incomprehensible quotes for future generations to spend fruitless lifetimes trying to work out. At the root of his enigmatic principles were discussions of the Tao – an invisible force that flows through all things. The Tao, according to him, cannot be seen, touched, or understood. Yet if one is in tune with the Tao, one need not fear or want for anything. The following is a typically inscrutable quote from the great sage.

“The Tao begets one, one begets two, two begets three, and three begets all things.”

This is not a treatise on Taoism, and in any case, according to the sage himself the Tao is unknowable. We will therefore begin with a look at the Chinese characters for “one,” “two,” and “three.” Appropriately enough, they are written as 一 (yi, one) 二(er, two) and 三 (san, three).

As you can see from these characters, written Chinese, even in its modern form, is still basically ideographic. This means that each character contains a visual clue to its meaning. With regards to 一, 二, and 三, these clues are obvious. Some modern characters that still pictorially represent their meanings include 人 (ren) person, 口 (kou) mouth, and 门 (men) gate.

The structure of written Chinese is the key to the beauty of its calligraphy and its poetry. If you have a basic comprehension of the theory of the written language, Chinese poetry, idioms, and even single characters take on an incredibly rich meaning of themselves.

Consider this character, 好，which is pronounced “hao,” and means “good.”

You will notice it is made up of two parts, 女and 子.女, pronounced “nu” means “woman.” 子, pronounced “zi” means “son.” Thus, a woman and a son combined means “good.”

This character gives the western observer an insight into the patriarchal aspect of traditional Chinese society, due to the fact having a son rather than a daughter is seen as “good.” In traditional society, a son was crucial to carrying on the family lineage. Since girls joined their husband’s family when they married, daughters were seen as transient members of their family and a drain on resources.

All 54 000 known Chinese characters, or “Hanzi” 汉字 have similarly interesting historical origins. If you have nothing to do for the next thirty to forty years, I would highly recommend delving further into this field!

With regards to poetry, the ideographic aspects of Chinese give enormous possibilities for clever plays on structure, many of which are unable to be adequately translated into English.

One such poetic device is the antithetical couplet. Since the number eight is considered fortunate by the Chinese, couplets are normally four characters in each line. Ideally, the parts of each character must also correspond to characters in the second line.

In the early twentieth century, furious debates raged about the structure of written Chinese and whether it was suitable for the modern world. There were those who believed a wholesale abolition of traditional writing and romanization of Chinese was the only way the country could move forward.

Thank god this movement failed. The structure of Chinese is so intrinsically different to English that systems of Roman letters will never be able to fully convey the depth of meaning that characters can.

The ideographic nature of Chinese characters means that there is a lot more detail in the written form of the language than the spoken. Consider the word “ta.” This word has many different meanings in English, including “he,” “she” and “it.” Spoken Chinese has no way of differentiating these words, but written Chinese does. In fact, Chinese characters have more detail than English. Not only do they have a character for “he” 他 “she” 她 and “it”它, there is also a character that represents “it” when discussing an animal – 铊. However, all these characters are pronounced the same way – “ta.”

Eventually, a process of simplification did take place in mainland China. Today there are two systems used worldwide. The one used on the mainland is known is English, curiously enough, as Simplified Chinese. The system used in Hong Kong, Macau and Taiwan, is known simply as Traditional Chinese.

If you are considering investing in some calligraphy as a gift or for your personal enjoyment, there are many things to consider. Chinese calligraphy is an art form in its own right. It encompasses historical, religious, societal, and aesthetic realms. Most people who buy calligraphy are partial to traditional characters rather than simplified, and even in China today there is a lot of nostalgia for traditional characters.

And as for Wang Yirong, the hero of our story who found the first Shang Dynasty oracle bones, there is some doubt regarding whether the story of a stomach ailment and being prescribed “dragon bones” is true. According to famous author and China-watcher Peter Hessler, the jury is still out on this particular tale. However there is no doubt that he was the first major modern collector of the oracle bone scripts. But Wang’s story ends in tragedy. In 1900, when the Boxer movement briefly swept the nation, Wang took command of some of their forces. In true patriotic spirit, he later committed suicide by jumping down a well after European, American and Japanese troops ransacked Beijing.

Has this spaceman eaten too many spacecakes?

2008-07-24T23:06:00.000-07:00

Or is the truth so crazy society can't deal with it?
How cool is this story? (From The Australian)

Former NASA astronaut Edgar Mitchell says aliens have contacted humans several times but governments have hidden the truth for 60 years.

The thing I want to know is, though, why is it NASA that the little green men always contact? This smacks of a conspiracy. I can see the Chinese headlines tomorrow: "Aliens are running dogs of the Imperialist West" "ET will not conquer China and her 5000 years of history" "Dalai Lama meets with Martians in an effort to split the motherland" haha. God I get amused by trivial things.

Juicing, gene therapy, and the Games

2008-07-22T08:21:00.001-07:00

According to The Australian July 22:

Chinese doping scams exposed

A multinational investigation of the doping trade in China found:

* A hospital that was willing to perform gene therapy on an Olympic athlete;

* An easily accessible black market for human growth hormone, steroids and EPO;

* A banned coach who has returned to the national swimming team;

* A former Chinese swimmer who has revealed how she was doped in the 1980s.

The findings were broadcast on German television in a documentary titled Flying High in Middle Kingdom. Some of the research was conducted by The Times' swimming writer Craig Lord and published on the website www.swimnews.com.

World Anti-Doping Agency director general David Howman described the revelations as "worse than my worst fears".

The investigators filmed the head of the gene therapy department of a Chinese hospital agreeing to give stem cell treatment to a fictitious American swimmer.

"We have no experience with sports people here, but the treatment is safe and we can help you," the doctor told a purported American swimming coach. "It strengthens lung function and stem cells go into the bloodstream and reach the organs. It takes two weeks. I recommend four intravenous injections ... 40 million stem cells or double that, the more the better. We also use human growth hormones but you have to be careful because they are on the doping list."

A Toronto sports doctor, Mauro di Pasquale, told the documentary there was an ongoing trade in gene doping in China.

"I know of several incidences where athletes, and this is from talking to coaches and other people that have direct knowledge, that several professional athletes in sports such as soccer, football and several amateur athletes even on the elite Olympic level have gone to China and had gene doping performed," he said. "These doctors -- I can't give the names -- are involved in university clinics, they are involved in hospitals and they also have their personal clinics."

However, the Chinese sports ministry insists the government is determined to stamp out the illegal trade.

"On the issue of international criticism of the illegal trade in medication, the Chinese Government takes the issue very seriously and takes strong measures to fight that illegal trade," said Jiang Zhixue, general secretary at the Chinese sports ministry.

But Howman said the documentary's evidence made him "sick in the stomach".

"This is very distressing," he said. "It is very scary that health professionals should have such a lack of ethics and try what we know to be experimental on human beings for a vast amount of money ($US24,000).

"That doesn't match up to the standards that we ordinarily require of doctors and other medical practitioners. This is even more dreadful, because what they are proposing to do is a total breach of the prohibited list of the standards we have implied to make sure that cheating through the use of gene doping or gene therapy is prohibited.

"And it is very distressing to see that perhaps it's been used now or could be used in a country where the magnificent event (Olympic Games) will soon take place."

The investigators also approached a Chinese company, GenSci, which agreed to supply steroids and EPO.

"The substance is a doping substance according to our government and that is why we are not supposed to sell this before the Olympics," the salesman said. "But after the Games business will be much easier again."

The documentary also explored the history of doping in Chinese swimming, uncovering the case of former breaststroker Huang Xiaomin, who won the silver medal in the 200m breaststroke at the 1988 Seoul Olympics.

Huang is now a coach in South Korea and confirmed the Chinese national team was subjected to systematic doping in the 1980s.

"We were administered the substances at regular intervals," she told the documentary makers.

"It always happened in a room at our dormitory. I couldn't take it every day because the side-effects were too strong."

The researchers exposed the presence in the national team of a female coach, Xu Huiqin, who has been banned twice after two of her swimmers tested positive for drugs -- the female swimmer Wang Luna at the Perth world titles in 1998, and a male swimmer Xiong Guomin in 1999.

They confirmed she was with the Chinese team at the world short-course championships in Manchester in April.

Hmmm is this evidence of a conspiracy, or a witch hunt? It seems to me that there are conditions that allow athletes to procure performance-enhancing powers with relative ease, but that doesn't automatically mean that they will. Furthermore, it's not as if loads of other countries don't have athletes that are willing and able to do the same kind of thing.

I have an intense dislike for the term "China-bashing" but this could tentatively be called it.

Quirks of Communism

2008-07-20T00:22:00.000-07:00

A great thing about living in Beijing is the numerous unusual working opportunities that are available to the wandering English-speaking writer.

One of my current projects is writing a guidebook on calligraphy and contemporary art - made all the more interesting by the fact that everything I write has to pass the beady evil eye of the censors before it gets published.

I'm still not that far into this book - but I can see that writing about contemporary art without mentioning its political content is going to be a challenge. However, even when discussing calligraphy this is a pretty tall order.

Take Chairman Mao as an example. The official line, as I understand it, is that although he made a few mistakes he was basically a great patriot and revered gentle giant among the Chinese people. His calligraphy is so admired it has even been made into a computer font. All of which is very interesting and nice.

But it doesn't change the fact that

Mao was a mass murdering prick!
He was responsible for the deaths of hundreds of millions of people!
If he was still in charge China would be so far up shit creek it wouldn't even matter if the country had a paddle!

Which is, of course, what I really want to write. So how to get around this curly question of ethics? The way I've done it is not mention Mao's name until the very last sentence of the text. In everything I've written up to that point the discussion focuses on the non-controversial aspects of his life and his particular style of writing. But I think this is particularly lame.

However, the only other option i can think of is going in completely the other direction and speak in terms of “the people’s glorious struggle against the capitalist-imperialist invaders and their vanguard, the religious missionaries.”
(Thankyou Granite Studio) Possibly, I could also mention the fact that Tibet is, was and always has been a part of China. At least if I follow this line some savvy readers may pick up a whiff of sarcasm.

Does anyone have any other ideas?

Western media with Chinese characteristics

2008-07-18T03:11:00.000-07:00

Yes, folks, it’s what you’ve always wanted. A take on the world from an ever-so-slightly satirical version of the China Daily. The story below is based on events reported, among places, here and here.

On China-based blogs it’s not too unusual to hear trolls (and clowns) talk about western media and Chinese media as if they were two sides of the same coin. In an attempt to highlight the differences between the two it is my pleasure to bring you the first of what will hopefully be a series of articles from the Western Daily.

Note: The idea behind referring to “The West” as one country also comes from the China Daily. This publication is guilty of a multitude of daily over-generalisations and incredibly simplistic conclusions (among other things). One of these habits they have is to refer to “The West” as if it is one entity where everyone acts and looks in tandem – often as part of a plan to tear China apart. Sigh. They give me so much to work with.

April 25th 2008

China hijacks torch relay in Australia Autonomous Region

The Sacred Flame, historically seen as a symbol of unity, peace and hope around the world, was hijacked by aggressive Chinese nationalists in Australia Autonomous Region (AAR) yesterday.

Patriots from the autonomous region turned out in force to support the relay, but were mobbed by hordes of fanatical international Chinese students, some frothing at the mouth in apparent pseudo-religious ecstasy.

Despite repeated assurances from the Chinese Government that the Games were to be used a symbol of world unity, most of these running dogs of the CCP, here as guests of The West, waved Chinese flags and sang so-called “patriotic” songs.

In actual fact these songs have been propagated by the ruling CCP, an evil political party with the soul of a dog and the spine of an iguana that has been responsible for the deaths of possibly hundreds of millions of Chinese people over the last half-century.

Attacks on the peaceful patriots of the region soon followed.

"We were being pushed and spat on, abused. We were kicked in the back and punched. We were hit with flagpoles. They pushed me to the ground," John Price said. (from The Australian April 25)

In a cunningly insidious move calculated to increase the outrage of the patriots of The West, the Chinese Embassy gave material and organizational support to the aggressive rabble, including arranging buses, field marshals, and communications equipment.

They even sent thugs and goons to attack anyone who came close to the sacred flame itself, although Kevin Rudd, Governor of the AAR had repeatedly assured the Chinese Government that the region’s crack police force would ensure its safety.

This despicable act, which interfered with the affairs of our nation, strongly hurt the feelings of the patriots of The West, who have invited hundreds of thousands of these Chinese hooligans to study and live in our various provinces and autonomous regions over many decades.

Following the occurrences, the Chinese media reported the event as a happy occasion where people exchanged lollipops and pandas and kangaroos danced together on rooftops.

It just goes to show how biased the Chinese media is when reporting what happens in The West.

These events are examples of the rise of ugly Chinese nationalism in recent years, with racial abuse of the Japanese being the most common outlet of their pseudo-nationalistic loathing.

We Westerners thought that most overseas Chinese students were just here to study hard and get good grades. This disgusting anti-western farce has seriously hurt our feelings. We just want to ask why does China send so many of its students overseas if they are going to take advantage of the freedom to protest in other countries, when they can’t even do it in their own?

We all know the answer to that one. China is trying to split The Western motherland apart. Don’t they know that can never happen? The West has been a country for hundreds of years. That’s far longer than the PRC has been in existence.

Randy religious youth run wild

2008-07-18T01:13:00.000-07:00

Consider this heart-warming tale from the sunny shores of Sydney:

Brothel reports WYD boost

July 18, 2008

A BROTHEL offering a special discount during Pope
Benedict XVI's visit to Sydney said business had more than doubled since the
pontiff arrived.

Sometimes religion just warms my heart.
Would somebody please, please buy these poor Catholic youth a packet of GOD DAMN CONDOMS?!

We really need a wai guo ren

2008-07-17T07:44:00.000-07:00

One of the trickiest aspects of living in China for a westerner is negotiating the potholed track of Chinese etiquette. When this is combined with the language barrier, the path becomes even more treacherous. At times it could be likened to a steep mountain pass with a sheer cliff face on one side, off which the unwary westerner is doomed to blindly stumble, and scream all the way into oblivion.

Nowhere was this more apparent to me than one evening in 2006 when a long-lost language partner gave me an unexpected call. It was great to talk to her again, even if the speed at which she was speaking Chinese was a little disconcerting.

“It’s been a long time,” she said. “Tonight we have a concert on. Would you like to come and join us?”

“Yeah sure,” I replied. “Is it ok to bring my girlfriend?”

“Of course.”

Twenty minutes later, we arrived at the meeting point. There was my friend, and a suited, bespectacled man standing anxiously by her side, hands clasped and a nervous tick.

“But where is your guitar?” she asked after the initial introductions had been made.

“My guitar? What for?” I asked, a slight premonition of foreboding in the pit of my stomach.

“Oh, we want you to perform in the concert,” she said, with all the offhandedness of someone asking the time. “Didn’t you understand me on the phone?”

Of course, this is an entirely casual request to make of a Chinese person. My own Chinese teacher was not averse to asking her adult students to get up in class and sing a song for the benefit of their classmates if they failed to complete their homework. On a tour bus in Sichuan once I had also been put in the position of singing to a bus half full of Chinese tourists and half full of my friends. But that was in the spur of the drunken moment. This was different. Really, really different. Westerners, especially Australians, are not in the habit of casting aside their insecurities and hang-ups for a sing-a-long on stage in front of a group of strangers.

“Ahh, but I haven’t played for a long time,” I lied. “And I can’t sing at all.”

Incidentally, the second part of this statement is agonizingly true.

“Oh, but we really need someone. And I told my friend you would be able to perform,” she said, indicating the man in the suit. “We have many Chinese students performing and everyone is having a lot of fun. But we told everybody we would get a wai guo ren to perform.” They both looked at me with big, beseeching eyes.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see my girlfriend doubled up with silent laughter at my situation.

“Umm,” I stammered trying desperately to think of a way out, “I am really out of practice. I’m not sure if I can do it.”

“Oh, it’s very relaxed,” she assured me. “How about you came and take a look?”

“Please come,” added the suited man, who turned out to be one of the concert organizers. “We really need a wai guo ren to perform.”

Against my better judgment I allowed my girlfriend and I to be escorted to the concert hall. My condition was that I would need to assess the situation before I would perform, but I knew then it was already almost impossible. Walking behind my language partner and the suited man, we discussed possible escape routes very quickly in English so they would not understand. My girlfriend happily came to the conclusion very early that I was doomed to severely embarrass myself. But I knew that neither my language partner nor her suited friend understood my situation. At that moment, I was the poor dumb foreigner perched on the cliff face of the cultural and linguistic divide. A lamb to the slaughter.

Arriving at the concert hall only increased the sick sense of foreboding deep in my gut. Word had got out that my friends were coming with the singing, guitar playing foreigner….. who for some reason had arrived without a guitar. A group of men in identical suits gratefully and earnestly shook my hand outside the entrance. “Thank you so much,” they said, oblivious to the churning mess in my stomach. “We really need a wai guo ren to perform.” They ushered me into the hall…… and there it was; four hundred odd people sitting in darkness with their eyes glued to the bright lights of the stage. Nobody was even talking. To say I felt faint was an understatement. At that point I seriously considered abandoning my girlfriend to run screaming out the door. It would serve her right for her lack of sympathy.

“It’s ok, right?” smiled my language partner. I wanted to punch her.

The next few minutes were a blur of miserable anxiety and frenzied, whispered instructions. There were guitars on hand but none suited to my style of playing. Worse, was only one song I could think of singing off the top of my head – “Old Man” by Neil Young. I know, I know, it’s a ridiculous choice. Preposterous, even. But it was all my befuddled brain and loose bowels could come up with.

The MC was introducing me. Despite the short circuit occurring in my cerebral cortex, I could grasp the words ‘wai guo ren’ and felt the weight of several hundred pairs of eyes, along with several hundred people’s expectations, lift me to my feet and drag me screaming into the void. The stairs up to the stage were a rocky mountain path. There was a cliff face at the edge of the stage. The stage lights in my eyes blinded me to the safest path forward. Hands shaking, I accepted the microphone from the MC.

It’s an odd experience, being put in a position such as this. Nobody in the crowd really gives a damn too much about the quality of the performance. It’s not like you are experiencing something truly dreadful like a car accident or being fired from you job. And yet you feel as if the eyes of the world are on you. They are waiting for you to make a complete and utter jackass out of yourself, so they can dance and laugh in unholy glee on the rotting corpse of your self-respect.

“Old man, take a look at my life” I croaked into the microphone….and the next few minutes dragged by in excruciating slow motion.

When the dismemberment was finally over, the crowd was polite enough to clap. My language partner was supportive, if somewhat “surprised” by my singing skills. My girlfriend thought it was the funniest thing ever, and couldn’t wait to tell everybody, yeah! The suited man invited me to stay and watch the rest of the performances.

I declined. My heart was still thumping, and my hands were still shaking. Guitarless, talentless, and now also self-respect-less, I left the hall and the cliff face behind me. With my oh-so amused girlfriend in tow, I walked away from that graveyard of music and vowed never to get caught on that rocky path of cultural misunderstanding again.

An interview with Kev Carmody

2008-07-17T07:30:00.000-07:00

‘Cannot Buy My Soul’, the Paul Kelly inspired tribute album to the music of Kevin Carmody, is now on sale. It is a double cd that features a selection of Carmody’s songs in their original format on one, and covers on the other. Artists on the album include (hold your breath and say it as fast as you can) Augie March Claire Bowditch, The John Butler Trio Troy Cassar-Daly The Drones Bernard Fanning Missy Higgins The Herd Dan Kelly Paul Kelly Steve Kilbey The Last Kinection Tex Perkins Archie Roach Sara Storer Dan Sultan Scott Wilson The Pigram Brothers The Waifs. Whew….

“I was traveling out on the motorbike. I’m hauling down the highway one night, about 11’o’clock, and argh, I just thought it was the wind, and I didn’t realise the bloody bag had dropped off, but the bungee cord was still connected to the bike and shredded it for 26 miles. So the next day I went back, got the old troop carrier land rover that I had, got the boys, and we went along the road and we picked up every bit we could find, and put it into plastic bags. As a postgraduate student I had a room in a university house, spread it out on the floor, called me supervisor over and said look, there’s me thesis mate…”

Such was the improbable finale to the university career of Kevin Carmody, singer/ songwriter, Aboriginal activist, environmentalist, social worker, nuisance to the political establishment and one time Phd history student. Reviews of Carmody’s albums are often almost reverential of his songwriting abilities, and the esteem in which he is held is reflected in the cross section of the cream of Australian talent vying for attention on his tribute album, ‘Cannot Buy My Soul.’ Over the crackly connection from his Queensland home, there is a hint of amusement in his voice as he recounts this footnote from his turbulent life journey. One gets the sense that Kevin is a character not easily fazed by such minor details or pitfalls, he has different work to do and a more profound message to impart.

The winding path of this life has it’s roots in a reality all but relegated to romantic history for the vast majority of urban Australia. It began with a nomadic droving lifestyle, in the post war period, living largely off the land. Carmody’s father was an Australian born drover of Irish heritage, “one step above the Aboriginals” as he notes of how the Irish were treated, and his mother a Murri woman whose country lies in the far north of Queensland. His early life was “surrounded by sensory perception” and the “phenomenal sounds of the wildlife.” The world as it appeared was a vast classroom of nature and the bounty she provides. Kevin can vividly recollect the smell of incoming rain, the meanings of different bird calls, and traditional stories, laden with meaning, taught to him from the “huge blackboard” that was the night sky. He learnt the ancient art of tracking from family members at the age of four, and helped out by shooting roos at the waterholes that the family camped near. “Everybody lent a hand,” is how he describes the spirit of mutual care and dependence from his early years. Contemplating that time, Kevin seems somewhat baffled by how later white ‘explorers’ such as Burke and Wills could possibly starve in this Garden of Eden.

However, the forcible removal of indigenous children was an ugly specter in the background of this happy family life, and as a result of that his parents had only two children, Kevin and a brother six years his junior. Although they were not ‘stolen’ in the sense that they were ripped from their screaming parents arms, as he recounts, “well we had to go.” On the first day of ‘school’ at, somewhat disturbingly, a former army barracks, as his parents left “They (the nuns) surrounded us and held us… held us down actually, in the corner of the dormitory.” Kevin was a child of ten. His brother was four years old.

Life in the barracks was full of alien customs for the Carmody boys. In their former existence it was considered “absolutely breaking the law” to defecate in water, yet puzzled, they noted that there was water in the toilets of their new home. Responsibly, they went outside to relieve themselves on the first night and received a flogging for their troubles, and not for the first time. Flogging was a routine punishment that could be meted out for a variety of crimes such as “getting your sums wrong” and “spelling something wrong in English.” Being physically abused in this way in public in front of a hundred odd other students was par for the course. The country boys were also put to work, collecting eggs, (which were subsequently sold rather than be fed to the students) washing dishes and helping out in the kitchen, so “there wasn’t too much time for school.”

Kevin’s voice is a matter of fact. It is a tale he has no doubt recounted on many occasions, and not the most gut wrenching account of the scarred recent history of indigenous people. Yet one can still get a sense, from these memories, of how experiences such as this shaped the character of an artist who can at times pack a hefty punch to the solar plexus of the listener.

From the age of thirteen, Kevin found employment in a variety of different jobs. The sudden turn in direction came with the ascent of the Whitlam government.

“At the night time I was always just interested in music, so I started to study music (by himself) and got to a standard, when I moved to Toowoomba and got a proper music teacher. And she said to me, ‘you know, your miles ahead of the standard they’d require to get into the music course at the University of Southern Queensland.’

“So that’s the first time it occurred to you to go to University?”

“Well it was better than the bloody welding sheds,.but the point is that I’d never been to a bloody library in me life, but I went out and auditioned, I’d been teaching myself out of a book, but they didn’t have a classical guitar teacher of the standard that the course required, so they said do a third of it history and philosophy.”

Due to his shoddy schooling, Kevin’s reading and writing skills were not initially up to the required university standard. Undeterred, he suggested to the history tutor that until such a time as his writing was up to scratch, he would present his research in a musical format accompanied by his guitar. It may have sounded like a novel approach but this was keeping in line with the far older indigenous tradition of history being transmitted without the use of books. Although he had extensive historical knowledge, learnt from his oral traditions, much of it could not be found in library history books and therefore technically cold not be cited in university assignments. His way around this was to attribute his sources to “unpublished works.” His academic career progressed until that fateful night on the motorbike, and then, “By that time, it must have been about ’87, I’d signed the record contract (for his first album) and that puts you on the bloody treadmill then so I deferred the Phd.”

The first of Kevin’s albums ‘Pillars of Society’ was cut, not coincidentally, 1988 and was designed to give “the other side of the fence” to the Bicentennial. In a real sense his career as a historian continued after he left university, “To me, the object of the music is to put down the oral history.”

It should be difficult to juxtapose the anger in some of Carmody’s lyrics with the ebullient enthusiasm and positivity projected through the voice on the line, yet somehow it is not. To talk only about the anger in some of his work would be to grossly misrepresent the message. Kevin speaks passionately and optimistically about his hopes for the future, and for his love of the country. These days his playing career is severely hampered by “Arthur Rightus,” yet he is honoured and delighted that his lyrics have found their way to a new generation of artists and different musical formats, seeing this as a strength of the oral tradition which he upholds.

“Tear it up, put your own bloody lyrics in, but make it relevant to your generation. Therefore the record becomes a collective, not Kev Carmody. We, all together, are saying this is what we think, this is what we feel.”

One can envisage that the lessons of this great Australian oral historian, who began his studies under the Queensland stars all those years ago, will continue their singing long after he has gone. Ironically, it was merely the path of the ill-fated thesis that ended in tatters on the highway from Brisbane.

‘They taught us

Oh Oh black woman thou shalt not steal

Oh Oh black man thou shalt not steal

We’re gonna civilise

Your black barbaric lives

And teach you how to kneel

But your history couldn’t hide

The genocide

The hypocrisy to us was real

‘cause your Jesus said

You’re supposed to give the oppressed a better deal

We say to you, yes whiteman thou shalt not steal

Oh ya our land you’d better heal’

(From Thou Shalt Not Steal sung by Kevin Carmody and the John Butler Trio on ‘Cannot Buy My Soul’)